Plutonium

Plutonium is an element that takes advantage of the magic relationship between 47 and 2: 47 plus 2 is 49, and 47 times 2 is 94.

Chemistry

Plutonium has five crystal structures with (mostly) distinct properties:

• α: The most dangerous phase, except for δ.
• β: Discovered by a mink farmer with too many eyes, it causes vomit to come out from unexpected places.
• γ: Ending its placement in the periodic table made the one that looks like y not be exactly y.
• δ: The other dangerous phase.
• δ': Exactly like δ, except you can't use be verbs.
• ε: At extremely high temperatures, plutonium can be turned nuetral.

Fan club

Plutonium has its own fan club: The UPPU Club! It is so much cooler than the Uranverein. The Uranverein just studies their element, but The UPPU Club urinates their element!

Plutonium in other contexts

Barack Obama at the Whitehouse Institute figured out that you could dilute plutonium to produce diluted plutonium. Meanwhile, Vladimir Putin at Kremlin University discovered that plutonium could be made into mixed oxide fuel to produce electricity.

In Armenia, grooms will give their brides rings made of plutonium.

Notes

Periodic Table

Group # 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 Period 1 1 H hydrogen 0 n neutronium Nonsence Illogicopedian Elements 2 He helium 2 3 Li lithium 4 Be beryllium 5 B boron 6 C carbon 7 N nitrogen 8 O oxygen 9 F fluorine 10 Ne neon 3 11 Na sodium 12 Mg magnesium 13 Al aluminium 14 Si silicon 15 P phosphorus 16 S sulfur 17 Cl chlorine 18 Ar argon 4 19 K potassium 20 Ca calcium 21 Sc scandium 22 Ti titanium 23 V vanadium 24 Cr chromium 25 Mn manganese 26 Fe iron 27 Co cobalt 28 Ni nickel 29 Cu copper 30 Zn zinc 31 Ga gallium 32 Ge germanium 33 As arsenic 34 Se selenium 35 Br bromine 36 Kr krypton 5 37 Rb rubidium 38 Sr strontium 39 Y yttrium 40 Zr zirconium 41 Nb niobium 42 Mo molybdenum 43 Tc technetium 44 Ru ruthenium 45 Rh rhodium 46 Pd palladium 47 Ag silver 48 Cd cadmium 49 In indium 50 Sn tin 51 Sb Antimony 52 Te tellurium 53 I iodine 54 Xe Xenon 6 55 Cs caesium 56 Ba barium * Lanthanoids 72 Hf hafnium 73 Ta tantalum 74 W tungsten 75 Re rhenium 76 Os osmium 77 Ir iridium 78 Pt platinum 79 Au gold 80 Hg Mercury 81 Tl Thallium 82 Pb lead 83 Bi bismuth 84 Po polonium 85 At astatine 86 Rn radon 7 87 Fr francium 88 Ra radium ** Actinoids 104 Rf rutherfordium 105 Db dubnium 106 Sg seaborgium 107 Bh bohrium 108 Hs hassium 109 Mt meitnerium 110 Ds darmstadtium 111 Rg roentgenium 112 Cn copernicium 113 Nh nihonium 114 Fl flerovium 115 Mc moscovium 116 Lv livermorium 117 Ts tennessine 118 Og oganesson * Lanthanoids 57 La lanthanum 58 Ce cerium 59 Pr praseodymium 60 Nd neodymium 61 Pm promethium 62 Sm samarium 63 Eu europium 64 Gd gadolinium 65 Tb terbium 66 Dy dysprosium 67 Ho holmium 68 Er erbium 69 Tm thulium 70 Yb ytterbium 71 Lu lutetium ** Actinoids 89 Ac actinium 90 Th thorium 91 Pa protactinium 92 U uranium 93 Np neptunium 94 Pu plutonium 95 Am americium 96 Cm curium 97 Bk berkelium 98 Cf californium 99 Es einsteinium 100 Fm fermium 101 Md mendelevium 102 No nobelium 103 Lr lawrencium