Axe

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Ah, the axe. The weapon that everyone knows and loves. Unless you've been hacked to death by one. Also, nobody loves axes. Mainly because they're dangerous and cause people to die. Or something like that. Axes are most commonly known for causing stereotypical deaths such as being stabbed in the back by one.

Yay.

That was sarcasm.

Where to find them[edit | edit source]

Axes are found normally in real life zombie infestation situations where you find an axe on the floor and begin hacking your way through the crowds while whistling a happy tune and then choking on your own spit, and slashing yourself with the axe.

Yup, axes are definitely glorious.

Did you say axis?[edit | edit source]

No. But seriously though? What's an axis? Is it the plural of axe?

Ooh, that's pretty cool.

I could say "Dude, you want some of these x and y axis?" (bad pun inteded)

"Y do i need them"

"Cause they're X treme."

(Bad puns intended)

Technically, you can't intend puns[edit | edit source]

Oh, but you can.

This is a load of gobshite. I'm going to bed.


I have no bed....I'm going to the floorboards....no wait, they're not fully dusted...

I'm going to the wardrobe.

You can't sleep in a wardrobe![edit | edit source]

Oh, but you can.

Stop saying that![edit | edit source]

Why should i?

Because...[edit | edit source]

Because 3 equals 2 plus one and together they can change the world.

That does not make sense.[edit | edit source]

You know what makes sense?

Money making mahcines make cents.

Also, Wikipedians make sense.

But that's too hard to understand completely.

A better description is: Wikipedians try to make sense.

Or should that be axis?

Editor's note[edit | edit source]

The spelling of "axis" was intended.

Yes, i know how to spell the plural of axe.

It is a-x-e-s.

Thank you and have a horrible day.

This article is part of the
ILLOGICOPEDIA GUIDE TO WEAPONRY
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