Applegate Vault #1 ~ Vault Code: 1421421** ~ "Airbag: An account of when you came crashing into Illogicopedia"

Main highlights/pivotal occurrences manifested in this archive:

I am semi-formally welcomed by Awesomedecks, I was subsequently engaged in my first illogical conversation with XY007, XY007 is the only user I talk to for over a month before Iamawesome finishes the two signatures I asked him to create for me, XY007 gives a formal apology, Estero welcomes me to Illogicopedia, I list every vinyl LP I have to XY007, Iamawesome asks me if I suck at maths, Fluffy Waffles doxes me, I win IOTM, I explain the origin of the 9+10=21 meme, I learn that Australians don't usually punch koalas, I have a mental breakdown, Fonchezzz welcomes me and makes me list my favorite bands, Iamawesome loses it in a potty-mouthed rant directed at me, Mars Cadbury protects my userpage, and I explain my ethnicity and nationality to Gruntled.

The quality of your last article was splendid, so I'm gonna give you a hearty welcome over here. A flashlight, a radio, and sweetcorn - I love being a policeman. ~ Good tidings! ~ 07:46, 25 Farbleum 2015 (UTC)

Why, thank you, Awesomedecks. I used breakthrough methods to make it seem as close to the work done on Joan Rivers as possible. So incredible that Dr. Mehmet Oz fell on his knees and cried, "My career is over!" A flock of zombie chicken demons then attacked him and cast him into Passages Malibu. User:Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive

Welcome to ?pedia! Hope you enjoy your stay. Please leave your nouns in the locker room (behind the the door marked "LOLCHEESE") So anyway, this is a pseudo-official greeting from a user who may or may not be an admin/sysop/werewolf, so here come the obligatory links to pages to help you out and tell you "Don't be teh vandal kthx": Our beginner's guide is here If you want more info on ?pedia, 'tis right here, and in case you've come from Wikipedia, Uncyclopedia or some other "humour" wiki, we also recommend that you understand how ?pedia is different from other wikis A less sensible explanation of our beloved 'pedia is here Our general disclaimer is not here, but here --> LOOKIE Don't be afraid to visit us on IRC DISCORD The rules, such as "ROFL KILL THE BABIESN'T PLZN'T (notn't)" are here. People breaking the rules will have a koala thrown at them, and may also possibly receive a Chinese burn. So, that's all for now... Please be nice, make great articles and help contribute to our community in any way possible: e.g. template making, voting for articles or users, et cetera. ~ The Illogicopedia Welcoming Committee “NO ACTUALLY, YOU'RE TERRIBLE AND WE HOPE YOU DIE.” ~ The Illogicopedia Community on welcoming new members

Whether it's through compulsory community service for crimes we won't go into or just personal choice, you've just joined illogicopedia. First and foremost, may I take your coat *rifles through the pockets*. This greeting if not nailed to your forehead (or applied forcefully with No More Nails) is most likely from an admin/werewolf/Jonas the Happy Vandal/Sysop which makes it excellent, so RELAX. Now we're all relaxed, I'll quickly get through the bits you need to know (rules and where to go etc, and my bribe of course): If you're actually a vandal then prepare to be squashed by an oversized novelty sandal. If you're a complete beginner to wiki's then you may want to click here. If you're nibbling on any cheese or cookies at the moment, STOP! ...Hammer Time! Those are for Santa - our resident stuttering old perv. Just so you know what we're about (the life drawing class is left of that pop-up) I'd advise clicking here. I have to emphasise the section "In comparison to other wikis", just incase you're a fleeing uncyclopedia/uncycling flea user etc. Any featured work will be rewarded with a gold star (to put on your Christmas tree) whilst any !$"?@#!1*&!! work will be rewarded with a swift slap to the chops. If you turn out to infact be a brilliant user and aren't at this point laughing at the huge crater you've made where the Illogia once stood then you could be elidgible for Writer of the Month (or at least an unofficial Insane/Dedication award). If all else fails drink holy water and watch as a big hole-y forms through your heart. If it all goes horribly wrong and the police find your stash of Nuclear warheads, have broken into your house, and the ghost busters are unavailable then you should probably franticly claw for help in the direction of these guys. If you want to wear a funny wig and sit in a house full of commoners or lards then a political party membership may be for you. I recommend the Strangled Cats party. When we finally figure out you're the user that keeps stealing our pocessions we're going to need to keep in touch with you (so we can get a clear shot at ya :P). So please feel free to leave comments on user's talk pages or our sparkling forum. You can talk to us directly on our IRC chatroom. Now all that's left is the complimentary welcoming mint, and my bribe. £<insert number with more zeroes than Binary Code at the end of it here> please. Make all cheques payable to hell.

Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.)

The Chromo Wars

Your username? I'm pretty sure 2+2=4 6. XY007 ^{T C} 05:26, 30 Arche 2015 (UTC)

Hey XY007 this is the magical unicorn rainbow realm of CARP known as "Illogicopedia," where 2+2=5 and sweet and gentle SOCIOPATHS express their inner feelings of fun and happiness and SPARKLES AND BEDAZZLE AND TOTAL CHAOTIC INSANITY! And by the way, the date was April 6, 2015 when I added this to my talk page, and I'm pretty sure my compadre Roberto pulled the plug on this website on April 2, 2015. If you wanna see why 2+2=5 no matter how much logic (hehe, LOGIC. Get it?) you use, please refer to Hail to the Thief for details. Sayonara! User:Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive

I'll pass the takorion of impreviousness that separates autoservice di intaka isa un'i iI1 92920 FMA between Giratina unle's z a Roberto hav not seen your errors, maybe 'twas Dialga? But currently I'm agreeing because it is April 7, 2015 in which I've added to this site of LOGIC, CAKES AND NACHOS FOR A KING! I like it for the personality, but not my opinion or that written in Estonian for the details that happiness never dies for the purpose of satire like Bcbkye on Uncyclopedia, and anyway I GOT BLOCKED OFF WIKIPEDIA FOR SOCK-PUPPETRY even thoi did nothing. OK? I not think that the site of April 2, 2015 was not pulled, for it was Dialga that turned back time. Kim. TL;DR I'm not taking mysteries; 2+2=6. XY007 ^{T C} 23:19, 6 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Hey XY007 i'm in my teens. User:Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive

Sim'i zim'i 'teen' is no concept of reductionism for purpose di XY007 am notinum 92920 for purposing. Yes t'was Dialga that did my errands for time for the wiki's closure on APRIL 7, 2015 that's what it's currently this time. at right now my clock's saying 11.22 am, but your mileage may vary,. Km patrolled: 1,5483.033 But then i might write Coptic characters till, the very end Imit im. XY007 ^{T C} 01:26, 7 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Hey XY007 have you met Awesomedecks yes no maybe so okay then. Darpadarpdarp is how the peacock of siberia goes because Putin is taking a milk bath. ANyway, how's the collab going? Good? Good! Now go home and ask for more cookies from your western neighbors. Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive

I shall not accept the mistral of conversative Roman votive statues that line the banks of the River Thames while Siberian geese are writing poems. Cookies anyone? Do you want to participate in Big Brrother 2015? XY007 ^{T C} 01:49, 7 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Tayk yer nyvvz owt man.

Nope. Keep this topic pls cause then they'll send me to Auchwitz Wonderland (the cronies of illogicopedia). They want my brain. Cuz Japan is tired of waiting for their Chinese Checkers. Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive

Parjeon? I'll certainly not allow that. Why not take some time in the waiting forum of service eh? XY007 ^{T C} 01:59, 7 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Drama llama, farmer llama, something that rhymes with -ama, llama,

Good alpaca, bad alpaca, disgruntled and sad alpaca. XY007 ^{T C} 02:01, 7 Arply 2015 (UTC)

I have no idea idea no no idea idea no no idea of what you're saying. I'm straight outta Compton, foo. Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive

Hey XY007 can you please desecrate my failed article? It's wedding. Some MLG illuminist tried working on it, but it was total CARP. Do with the article as you please. 2+2=5

Impervious subservients make them on their way. 02:32, 7 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Homosexuality, Atheism, Karl Marx, Otaku culture, Uncle Pete, a squid, several horses, and a side order of fries

Collab? I think you will really like this article, even if it is a little short on Radiohead references. XY007 ^{T C} 23:21, 6 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Rewrite the factor of this page with meh, I'm always up for collab. XY007 ^{T C} 01:29, 7 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Bacon is slaughter

Nothing much eh? I am not Caucasian, that's one thing, but I do know a very small amount of Spanish? XY007 ^{T C} 02:41, 7 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Ever endured the passport check on the late night flight out of YVR-Airport? XY007 ^{T C} 02:44, 7 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Nope. I see you stumble upon my fake user article. please edit it. 2+2=5

Callulon metrum. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 02:52, 7 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Are you Jewish? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:01, 7 Arply 2015 (UTC)

No, i am not Jewish. I'm a Hindleyite. Yup yup. If you are not Caucasian, what are you? 2+2=5

I exist. Can you outline some scriptures of Hindleyism for me? I just assumed you were Jewish because 'bacon is slaughter'. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:14, 7 Arply 2015 (UTC)

"Oh, my head hurts. Fetch the brian medicine." "Get lorst" --The Great Hindleyite of Hindley. 2+2=5

Does it have to be brian medicine? Can it not be brain medicine? I'm a follower of DidYouKnowism. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:34, 7 Arply 2015 (UTC)

DO NOT QUESTION THE GREAT DIVINE PERFECT WORDS OF THE GREAT HINDLEYITE OF HINDLEY! 2+2=5

Making a template

Just type up what you can in the Template: namespace. But then you have to transclude it so, to transclude a page you wrap the template name (without Template: namespace) in {{}}. BTW, stop editing other people's user pages. Would you like it if someone did that to you? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 04:32, 8 Arply 2015 (UTC)

ALright, I'll stop. But who's the one that added the "Undulum Calendar" to MY user page??? Huh? HUH!? BTW thanks for the instructions. 2+2=5

You told me to edit it OK? Now before we can get into a fight can I show you the Roman votive statues I made?

RVS	This user LOVES Roman votive statues.

XY007 i said to edit my TROLL page (which is right here.), not my USER page. I don't blame you. You're only an eeble panda. 2+2=5

OK too true. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 02:33, 9 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Brain medication

Note for one that; I am an eeble panda. Also use the userbox templates. Also are you a sock of Fluffy Waffles? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 23:24, 8 Arply 2015 (UTC)

No, User:Fluffy Waffles is my classmate in computer class. I go to this website after I'm done with my assignments, but when he saw me on this website, he was all like, "Dude what the fuck is that? Is that a retarded Wikipedia?" and I'm all like, "No, it's an insane Wikipedia. Not even Uncyclopedia is like this," and then he saw me editing a page and then he was all like, "wait you can add random shit to these articles?" and I was like "Heck yeah you can," and finally he said, "Well fuck this shit I'm gonna join that site! What's it called?" He's Mexican by the way, and he's in Umpteenth grade. 2+2=5

Aren't wikis so much fun? You can check out my edits at Bulbapedia. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 02:29, 9 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Hey XY007 can you tell other users to tall-k on THIS page because so far it's only been you and me on here. I WOULD REALLY APPRECIATE IT IF YOU DID. I YOU DO I'LL GIVE YOU A CHEESEBURGER AND 20 INTERNET POINTS!

Def-i-ni-tely. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 02:42, 9 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Ice cream

What's your favourite ice cream flavour (with 'ou's for enjoyment)? For me, it's salted caramel. My sister who is standing here at the moment says choc chip. Yours? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 02:48, 9 Arply 2015 (UTC) my favourite flavour of ise cr3me is cookies and cr3me. Btw im 14. 2+2=5 Yiu hav a susut3r???

Yes. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:48, 10 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Rule Phrubub,

Phrubub nose the cheese, He also ears it but do we eat cheese? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:50, 10 Arply 2015 (UTC)░░░░░░░░▌▒▒█░░░░░░░░▄▀▒▒▒▐ ░░░░░░░▐▄▀▒▒▀▀▀▀▄▄▄▀▒▒▒▒▒▐ ░░░░░▄▄▀▒░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒█▒▒▄█▒▐ ░░░▄▀▒▒▒░░░▒▒▒░░░▒▒▒▀██▀▒▌ ░░▐▒▒▒▄▄▒▒▒▒░░░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▄▒▒▌ ░░▌░░▌█▀▒▒▒▒▒▄▀█▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒█▒▐ ░▐░░░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▌██▀▒▒░░░▒▒▒▀▄▌ ░▌░▒▄██▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░░░░░░▒▒▒▒▌ ▀▒▀▐▄█▄█▌▄░▀▒▒░░░░░░░░░░▒▒▒▐ ▐▒▒▐▀▐▀▒░▄▄▒▄▒▒▒▒▒▒░▒░▒░▒▒▒▒▌ ▐▒▒▒▀▀▄▄▒▒▒▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░▒░▒░▒▒▐ ░▌▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▀▀▒▒▒▒▒▒░▒░▒░▒░▒▒▒▌ ░▐▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░▒░▒░▒▒▄▒▒▐ ░░▀▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░▒░▒░▒▄▒▒▒▒▌ ░░░░▀▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▄▄▄▀▒▒▒▒▄▀ ░░░░░░▀▄▄▄▄▄▄▀▀▀▒▒▒▒▒▄▄▀

░░░░▒▒▒▒▌ ▀▒▀▐▄█▄█▌▄░▀▒▒░░░░░░░░░░▒▒▒▐ ▐▒▒▐▀▐▀ ░░░░▒▒▒▒▌ ▀▒▀▐▄█▄█▌▄░▀▒▒░░░░░░░░░░▒▒▒▐ ▐▒▒▐▀▐▀ ░░░░▀▄▄ ░░░░▀▄▄ !XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 02:42, 12 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Sure you do. User:Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive

Nih? Apple pie. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 02:46, 12 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Oh and edit conflict.

Edit conflicts? Elaborate. Btw if you're not Caucasian then what are you?

A Hindleyite. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 02:52, 12 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Because Hindleyites care not for race but for brain medication.

Then blaze that 420 I will. Gozimnot Also you should come up with a few aliases like i did recently.

I sense that we will face religious persecution XY007. How shall we proceed?

Curse you and your edit conflicts. But then my aliases - Illogicopedia's Resident Deity - IP2578 - ChromoBond Father of Hindleyism - The Mink Milker - Unhallipitor - Reparion - Teh Estonian Webdev (no that's this guy) - Public Transport Victoria? Also remember to sign your posts. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:02, 12 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Sigs

Finished the first 2 sigs (here). Please tell me if you like them. Iamawesome  T | C | U  06:13, 12 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Formal apology

I'm sorry for being an absolute cow over your Radiohead page, I just don't like it that much. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 07:32, 14 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Don't trip, yo. I get more criticism on a Saturday evening on Sunset Boulevard for being too "Californian" with my uncle the hippy than the criticism I was getting from (I'm super sorry for saying this) you. And it wasn't all your fault. I'm gonna make a huge confession here: I do have a form of OCD in which I become extremely impulsive and repugnant about a very specific topic (which would be Radiohead, of course), and I completely disregard the opinions of others (even if they're good opinions). It is something that occurs that becomes out of my own control, and others like you on Illogicopedia have to pay for it, and it's not fair. So, because you have provided an apology and explanation, I will as well.

I, too, apologize for my egregious behavior over such a ridiculous topic, but like I explained earlier, it can get beyond my control, and others have to pay for it. I am sorry, and I will now try even harder to keep myself under control, because I don't want to catch myself saying, "Phew, for a minute there, I lost myself."

OK, should we collab on Dictionary of Californian Slang? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:17, 15 Arply 2015 (UTC)

As soon as I get the chance. Right now I'm working on Radio Head, a truly illogical page that is targeted at people who don't know about Radiohead is. There are no references, so any author can edit it to their own will.

All right thanks. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:27, 15 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Big Brrother 2015

We need 7 users, but will we ever have that number, or should I start the show now we have five? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 04:24, 16 Arply 2015 (UTC) If we don't have at least one more user participating in the next 72 hours, then you ougjt to start. 2+2=5

Welcome to Illogicopedia!

Based on your userpage, I think that you would make a perfect fit amongst us Illogicopedians. We hope that you could have fun editing and creating nonsensical wiki pages. I could remember a time when I was new here. Luckily, my experience from Uncle Pete has helped me tremendously in my illogical ventures. In other news, welcome! --Estero (talk) 13:20, 17 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Sespia septum morum. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 21:44, 17 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Vinyl

Tell me more about your collection, mink. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 06:17, 19 Arply 2015 (UTC)

I'm guessing you collect them as well? Anyway, here's what I got:

• "Mothership," a 4 LP collection of Led Zeppelin's greatest hits. (2007)
• "Spanish Guitar" by some flamingo guitarist named John Williams. (1970)
• "Greatest Hits" by Mozart, a double LP. (1972)
• "Swingin' Dixie" by some American trumpet player named Al Hirt. (1957)
• "Abbey Road." I don't think I need to tell you the rest. (1969)
• "El Camino," which was the breakthrough album of The Black Keys. (2011)
• "Liberian Suite," an essential jazz album by Duke Ellington
• "Oh, Inverted World," the debut album of The Shins. (2001)
• "Port of Morrow," The Shins' breakthrough album. (2012)
• 2 of Beethoven's symphonies from ranging years.
• "The Eraser," the first solo album of Thom Yorke that was well received by the media. (2006)
• "Tomorrow's Modern Boxes," Thom Yorke's second solo album that was not well received, but he made $20 million off of it via BitTorrent.
• "The Long Run" by The Eagles. (1979)
• "The Bends," my personal favorite album of all time. I don't need to say by who. (1995)
• "OK Computer," "their" breakthrough album that was #1 in every country it was available in. (1997)
• "Hail To The Thief," "their" scariest album of all time. (2003)
• "Other Colors...The BBC Sessions of Radiohead," an uber rare vinyl. (????)
• "Is This It," the debut album of The Strokes (2001)
• "Locals Only" by some Californian surfer band called Surf Punks. (1998)
• I'll buy some more next weekend.

2+2=5

Um no I do not collect these, I don't like this sort of thing. Also for the date of 'Other Colors' maybe check Wikipedia? Some music I do like can be found here. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 09:34, 20 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Do you suck at maths?

Because the Undulum Calendar calculation method is kind of wrong. Here's what happens if I feed your method into #expr: -1479

But the correct way would be to substarct 1502 from the current year and THEN mod 40 giving 1

So do you suck at maths? Iamawesome  T | C | U  18:26, 19 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Yes, I do, because 9+10=21. Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (talk) 20:41, 19 Arply 2015 (UTC)

shut up Jeremy u said u hav an a in algebra Fluffy Waffles (talk) 00:48, 20 Arply 2015 (UTC)

What are you talking about, Fluffy Waffles? Are you calling me Jeremy? *chuckles nervously* That-that's n-not my name! *chuckles nervously* DUDE WHAT THE F***!? ARE YOU SERIOUSLY GOING TO REVEAL MY PERSONAL INFORMATION HERE!? Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (talk) 00:54, 20 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Fluffy Waffles, please don't dox this guy. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 01:18, 20 Arply 2015 (UTC)

haha 2+2=5 told me about u xy007 Fluffy Waffles (talk) 01:24, 20 Arply 2015 (UTC)

he also told me that u suck d*** Fluffy Waffles (talk) 01:25, 20 Arply 2015 (UTC)

STFU Fluffy Waffles. Are you really gonna be vulgar here like you are in real life? Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (talk) 01:27, 20 Arply 2015 (UTC)

What did you say 2+2-5? This is getting awkward. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 04:49, 20 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Look, sometimes Fluffy Waffles can be a total a**hole in real life. Apparently he wants to be one here on Illogicopedia as well. And what did I say? STFU (if you don't know) stands for shut the f*** up. Oh, and he is VERY vulgar. Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (talk) 02:06, 21 Arply 2015 (UTC)

I do know what STFU stands for. I imagine, plenty of people where I live are like that, like for example there's a Pakistani guy at No. 42 who blasts loud heavy metal music at 4:00am. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:03, 21 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Have you seen my most recent diary entry on the big brother page? Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (talk) 03:25, 21 Arply 2015 (UTC)

I have. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:37, 21 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Where were when all that happened? Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (talk) 03:55, 21 Arply 2015 (UTC)

I was in the library. You know that complex is the size of Slovakia, so you couldn't find me. Now I am eating my dinner too. Chicken Penang curry anyone? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 07:26, 21 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Userpage

Your userpage title is kind of clever. I like radomness. Did you get the idea from mine? Iamawesome  T | C | U  17:45, 22 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Comme tchi que l'affaire va? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 23:09, 22 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Iamawesome which userpage title are you talking about? Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (talk) 00:31, 23 Arply 2015 (UTC)

All of them... I guess... Also are you ever going to use your sigs? Iamawesome  T | C | U  04:42, 23 Arply 2015 (UTC)

2+2=5 (T | C) Can you kind of dumb down the instructions for me? I'm still receiving an education. Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (talk) 00:23, 24 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Hello? Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive 00:37, 24 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Hellooooooo? Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 00:46, 24 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Sorry, I didn't notice your edit in the recent changes.

1. Save your sig into User:Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive/sig1 or something.
2. Go here and scroll until you see "Signature".
3. Type in {{SUBST:nosubst|(your sig page here)}}
4. Done! Talk to someone to see if it works.

Iamawesome  T | C | U  11:21, 24 Arply 2015 (UTC)

K. But as you may know, I created this already: Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 04:09, 25 Arply 2015 (UTC). Do you know how to change the color of the font?

(Shawn) Oh, and don't worry about the one you created for me. I'll still use it.

There's an easy way and a hard way:

Easy: <font color=(color)>(text)</font>

Hard (not rly, but u can do more stuff wif css): <span style="(your css heer, color is 'color:(color)')">(text)</span>

And I REALLY recommend making a page for your sig. Anyone who wants to edit talk pages will go MAD with sigs like that. Also with a page you can also use internal (not inline!) css, allowing for text to change on hover. Iamawesome  T | C | U  11:00, 25 Arply 2015 (UTC)

A pet weasel

Nothing nothing. Nothing. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 01:26, 24 Arply 2015 (UTC)

I need another vanity article. Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 01:27, 24 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Greetings

Belch? 02:35, 25 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Art thou my mummy? Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 04:35, 26 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Mimbulus mimbletonia. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 04:38, 26 Arply 2015 (UTC)

The Knights of Cydonia. Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 04:53, 26 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Frisian Pier Geldofs Donia! XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 05:12, 26 Arply 2015 (UTC)

I caught pneumonia in Patagonia while drinking ammonia! Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 05:14, 26 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Give me the Rindfleischetikettierungsüberwachungsaufgabenübertragungsgesetz

Uhh... XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 05:39, 26 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Give me chocolate. [heavy metal music ensues] ~ Good tidings! ~ 07:10, 26 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Give me fuel give me fire give me that which I desire. [more heavy music ensues, played by Metallica.] Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 19:07, 26 Arply 2015 (UTC)

So, do you do the maloik or the sign of the fox? ~ Good tidings! ~ 21:42, 26 Arply 2015 (UTC)

I do the maloik with my pet Dalek the smerlwek. How's the ossololoboota doing? Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 21:50, 26 Arply 2015 (UTC)

I do the weasel with a pet weasel weasel. 202.142.129.178 01:01, 27 Arply 2015 (UTC)

TONGUE TIED! TONGUE TIED! TONGUE TIED! BONAFIDE! GENOCIDE! PESTICIDE! TONGUE TIED! TONGUE TIED! TONGUE TIED! Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 01:12, 27 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Tompkins, how do you be so short? ~ Good tidings! ~ 01:51, 27 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Mr. Worthington, how do you be so minuscule? Come off it, laddy! Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 01:56, 27 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Hey!

I'm doing great! On the field of VFF, we're not doing so well. On the bright side, I like it when I edit an article and that particular article gets a little better. It comes to me most of the time.--Estero (talk) 02:59, 27 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Ippal. 202.142.129.178 03:02, 27 Arply 2015 (UTC)

I really do not want to mention the country that rhymes with that, so... would you care for some bangers 'n' mash? Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 03:06, 27 Arply 2015 (UTC)

I will edit as an IP today, due to my computer being broken, so is that fine? 202.142.129.178 03:07, 27 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Also, edit conflicts are like weasels, they strike when you least expect them.

Yeah, let's collab on Knife Party. Best that you do most of it, though, because I do not want to be culturally inaccurate. Also, under one condition: no minks, eebles, ferrets, pandas, or any of that except sjink, fjink, imp, impi, and sonk whenever you're describing how Knife Party sounds. Thanks! Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 03:11, 27 Arply 2015 (UTC)

OK then. It sounds like this: tjink tjink tjink! ca klink! ca klink! stoat, otter, snake, red tiger, sun bear, pa klink! 202.142.129.178 03:24, 27 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Take out "sun bear" and that's who it should be m8. Good luck on Knife Party! Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 03:26, 27 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Sure...--Estero (talk) 04:47, 27 Arply 2015 (UTC)

COLLAB

On Wreck-It Ralph. It was redlinked on a couple of pages and I can't stand red links. I think you may be more of an expert on the subject than I am, so collab? If not, then weasel. If yes, then ferret! XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:17, 1 Aym 2015 (UTC)

I appreciate your help. Tchi 'a pas trop mal. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:31, 1 Aym 2015 (UTC)

IOTM!

congrats! you have won the itom award! just place {{IOTM}} somewhere of your userpage and some admin will come around and make you a phantom. I alrady emptied Forum:Illogicopedian of the Month and added you to the archive. Iamawesome  T | C | U  05:01, 1 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Gladly. Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 23:54, 2 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Featured Illogicopedian

This user is a winner of the Illogicopedian of the Month award.

(See other winners)

Ma sonk sonk kah-eeble. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 23:58, 2 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Where does 9+10=21 proof come from originally? I forget. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 01:15, 3 Aym 2015 (UTC)

It was some internet meme here in America where it shows a young African-American boy and an unseen voice that's starts the video saying "You're stupid." The boy replies, "No I'm not." So the unseen voice says, "Alright, what's 9+10?" and then the boy answers, "21." The unseen voice, instead of laughing his arse off, replies sternly, "No it's not. You're stupid." It's pretty cruel yet pretty funny. Then again, the Americans and the Japanese can see humor in anything, so... yeah. Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 01:24, 3 Aym 2015 (UTC)

There aren't very many Australian memes to speak of, note. .... .... FRANK WALKER FROM NATIONAL TILES! XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 01:35, 3 Aym 2015 (UTC)

What? Is frank walker related to Paul walker? Is national tiles a movie or sitcom or book? Remember, all I know about Australia and its inhabitants is that punching koalas is their pastime. Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 01:48, 3 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Nope. Frank Walker is not related to Paul Walker, National tiles is a tile company (here is their website) and we don't usually punch koalas. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 01:58, 3 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 02:02, 3 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Pardon my existence...

...but the whole point of the 'Amigo' article was that it was meant to be a wildly accurate representation of Spanish, just as Omelette du fromage is comprised of incredibly stereotypical and improper French. My apologies if it offended you and such like, but most of the article was making fun of Korean pop music that uses Spanish words for no reason as well as that guy from AiCaL who carries around an ice cream cart (which I'm aware is actually something along the lines of carro helado and not heladería).

It's also one of my first ever articles, which means it's pretty uninspired and close to trash in nature, so feel free to rewrite the whole thing if you want. ~ Good tidings! ~ 01:25, 4 Aym 2015 (UTC)

I was and am not offended (although it sure seems like I am expressing just that on my statement), I was just like "Really? Bruh! C'mon!" I really couldn't help it, primarily due to the fact that Spanish is my first language, and I am passionately Hispanic. Lo siento mucho. Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 01:31, 4 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Also,

This may alleviate things further. Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 01:34, 4 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Our next collab

I suggest we collab on The Dress. That page is desperately in need of expansion. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 02:09, 5 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Congratulations on IOTM!

Despite what you have informed me about asking for votes, I'd say that I helped make a considerate difference in the polls. By the way, keep up the good work. We're all impressed!--Estero (talk) 04:24, 6 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Venetian blinds and ice cream

It appears your brother has joined Uncyc. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:37, 7 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Who... oh yeah, that 12 year-old potty mouth who's a smaller radiohead fan than me and is obsessed with Apple mobile products whilst im into books? Yup, that's probably him. Does his username sound like one I would use? Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 13:28, 7 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Yeah he's Gozimnot. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 02:28, 8 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Ummm....

I don't know what to say about that, I haven't seen the movie a lot... Nontheless, I found some interesting people over here. Age is but a number, coolness can apply to nearly anybody.--Estero (talk) 16:21, 9 Aym 2015 (UTC)

What movie? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 22:58, 9 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Just 2+2=5 do you want to help me with The Dress page?

BEEF (is also slaughter.)

Now we do for our next collab, 2015 UK election. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 23:56, 9 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Done. Another one we should do is some German car manufacturer, like Audi and BMW. BTW the movie i was talking about with Estero is "Schindler's List." Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 00:46, 10 Aym 2015 (UTC)

First Audi, then Schindler's List. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 00:50, 10 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Ok, but for Schindler's List you have to know about the Holocaust and see the trailer first. We don't want to offend anyone who, despite their sillyness that we might see on Illogicopedia, may take the Holocaust seriously, especially if that person is Jewish. We dont know the real-life religions users here on Illogic, so it's best that we dont take a risk. Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 01:22, 10 Aym 2015 (UTC)

True, true. There are some Jews on Uncyc too, like Mordillo. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:17, 10 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Please help with The Book of Hindley. You could write about how you, the Archbishop, first was enlightened by the Great Hindleyite of Hindley. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 07:13, 10 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Nice? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 00:38, 11 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Huh? Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 01:49, 13 Aym 2015 (UTC)

PORK (Let me guess. Slaughter)

OK? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 23:04, 19 Aym 2015 (UTC)

PORK (Let me guess. Slaughter)

OK? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 23:04, 19 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Murrgh. And then there's Daniella... Wait, what? Dididididididi diddums. Massacat. But it was Ayannah first... Hheeeeeeee. Cleveland? No. No?

Hello, one and all. Erm, turtles. Anywho, uh, hi.

I am now officially insanely in love with... Well, someone, and i mean the girl i talk about.

Umumumumumum... I r really cant explain - what?

Eh pareszzzxx pleeses.

MODESELEKTOR!!!!!!!!!!

I skared. It undenied. Leave me alone. CONTEARYYRATAF

what? no...

She looks like the real thing... My fake plastic love...

I think you guys can see it now; i just might be in lurv.

It is with a heavy heart that i say this, but i will not be here often now. Not only do i have to pursue a relationship that can change my life (she's the greatest thing that has ever happened to me), but now i must also focus on my education.

Shut up, you fool.

Sorry, ill alvayz be on Illogicipedia.

Please.

She has Asperger's.

I can't hold on...

Why hey why hwy ywh

Um...

Hi.

It's gonna be a glorious day.

Today is the most perfect day i have ever seen.

Kumbaya.

Hi.

Uh...

Im not gonna leave.

I will always be here.

Godspeed.

Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 17:00, 21 Aym 2015 (UTC)

I realised just who Flower Base really is

Flower Base is an alias of a user also known as 'Pinky Jones' and 'Lol Pink' who has vandalised other wikis, such as Uncyc and Wikipedia in the past. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:41, 22 Aym 2015 (UTC)

I sense a new wave of vandals that will arrive soon... probably within the next month. (Summer vacation) Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 04:37, 22 Aym 2015 (UTC)

I think the summer (your summer) will bring a wave of old editors back. Nice isn't it ceh? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 04:58, 22 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Radiohead?

Hi. Fonch here. See you're into good music. Yeah I've been kickin' round these parts on and off since the good ole days in 2007. I do things sometimes and write weird things. If you need anything spank a poodle, and I'll come a runnin'. Any other favorite bands?--76.179.104.154 00:59, 26 Aym 2015 (UTC)

oops I fergot to log in.--|Fonchezzz| Quacking| 01:00, 26 Aym 2015 (UTC)

I'm mostly into both American and British indie bands, groups, and artists. BECAUSE this is the magical realm of CARP, i'll list them awl.

1. Radiohead
2. Portishead
3. Sonic Youth
4. Smashing Pumpkins
5. Thom Yorke
6. Bjork
7. Phillip Selway
8. Death Cab for Cutie
9. Interpol
10. The Strokes
11. Editors
12. RJD2
13. Pendulum
14. Foo Fighters
15. Nirvana
16. Knife Party
17. The Doors
18. Creedance Clearwater Revival
19. Atoms for Peace
20. Led Zeppelin
21. The Black Keys
22. Muse
23. DJ Shadow

Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.) 16:53, 26 Aym 2015 (UTC)

What a...

Well, I've been right so far in predicting who the winner of Beebee 15 gonna be, so I'll finally let it slip — given how well you seem to get along with the guy that calls himself host, I'm pretty sure it'll be you. I would suppose that would make you the winner of Decks' Slightly Notable Hypothetical Big Brrother Winner Award Thing. Your prize might be a collection of tree frogs, but it honestly depends on whether you're concerned about ending up with fishbowl-related medical conditions. ~ Good tidings! ~ 11:24, 26 Aym 2015 (UTC)

Treefrogs! It ... can't be. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 05:01, 28 Aym 2015 (UTC)

It seems your brother (Gozimnot on Uncyc) is being annoying. Eh? Venetian blinds and ice cream? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 23:02, 2 Yoon 2015 (UTC)

Keep going wizza forum. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:31, 3 Yoon 2015 (UTC)

FIX THE F*** OUT OF YOUR SIG

JUST FINISH OFF THE SPANS AND DON'T F***ING RUIN EVERYONES TALK PAGE WITH YOUR STUPID ENLARGED TIMES NEW ROMAN!!!! J00 ST0PID! JUST LEARN SIMPLE F***ING HTML!

It is not times new roman, good sir. The name of the font is "garamont." I refuse to learn "SIMPLE F***ING HTML" because I have other things in computers to learn. Unlike you, I maintain my rationality during times when I am being personally attacked (ahem, admins? Oh wait, you're not eliGIBLE to be an admin) and I simply ask that you calm down. You could've also asked me to fix my sig in a more courteous manner. But, because I do not listen to pompous users who capitalize and censor any certain 4 lettered word, I will not shrink my sig unless you or another user asks me to do so in a calm, rational, and courteous manner.

One more thing: If you choose to attack me ONCE more, I will not use the sigs you created for me.

LASTLY,

Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.)

19:31, 4 Yoon 2015 (UTC)

That is so stupid. I understand your conflict. That's annoying. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 22:51, 4 Yoon 2015 (UTC)

Well I apologize if you see it that way as well XY007, but until you, Iamawesome, or some.admin tells me in a calm, rational And courteous manner to shrink my sig, I'm afraid I will not do as.Iamawesome.requested. Besides, would you ever listen to someone's irrational and.disrespectul demands in real life and on this website? Last time I checked, this wasn't the military. 2+2=5

Protected userpage

Due to the recent influx of vandals vandalizing your userpage, I have protected it with an expiration date of one year. That should put a stop to it. —Marzipan (talk) 08:36, 7 Yoon 2015 (UTC)

Meow

Meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow, meow, meow meow meow. Sir KJ24 - (chatter) 00:47, 9 Yoon 2015 (UTC)

Have the Palestinians finally freed you?

Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.)

00:48, 9 Yoon 2015 (UTC)

I'm sinking! I'm sinking! Vot are you sinking about?. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 00:50, 9 Yoon 2015 (UTC)

I am sinking about how I can fix my signature. Can't you see how it messes everything up with the retarded timestamp?

I'll demonstrate:

Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive (Break my front door down.)

^

Then I don't know what to do. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 01:00, 9 Yoon 2015 (UTC)

El Salvador Dali

I'm pretty sure the list of vital articles is restricted to what Wikipedia thinks it vital. I don't see it on their list, so I'm removing it. If you find I am wrong, let me know and we'll put it back. Of course, El Salvador is vital for other reasons. Like, it has a mustache, and fruit grows there. And most of the population actually live on Mars. (kaizum me) 00:30, 21 Yoon 2015 (UTC)

The great Hindleyite has returned!

He is here! We shall all celebrate! For he is here! Oh wait... that's pretty redundantah. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 23:24, 23 Yoon 2015 (UTC)

Radioheadⁿ

So... Radiohead. Again. Still. Obsessed much? On a lighter note, did you see Radiohead on South Park? They called Scott Tenorman a pussy for crying after he found out he ate his parents. Now that's comedy! (kaizum me) 02:30, 11 Jumbly 2015 (UTC)

Thom: "Uh, excuse me?" Stan: "Who are you?" Jonny: "We're that band: Radiohead." Ed: "Geez, what a little crybaby." Colin: "You gonna cry all day, crybaby?" Thom: "Everyone has problems. Doesn't mean you have to be a little crybaby about it." Ed: "Come on guys, let's go. This kid is totally not cool." Thom: "Yeah, that's the most uncool kid I've ever met!" Phil: "Little crybaby!"

Yeah... Scott Tenorman wasn't directly called a pussy, but was most definitely called a "crybaby." I actually thought they would actually use the actual term because the band themselves are a little potty-mouthed, but then again, they also hate fame. 2+2=5 (Tay | Say) 03:07, 11 Jumbly 2015 (UTC)

What? XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:25, 11 Jumbly 2015 (UTC)

Radiohead's guest appearance on South Park (TV show). 2+2=5 (Tay | Say) 03:27, 11 Jumbly 2015 (UTC)

All right. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 03:36, 11 Jumbly 2015 (UTC)

It's some damned funny shit, by crikey! (kaizum me) 05:59, 11 Jumbly 2015 (UTC)

Obsessing with subtlety is the way to go. I suppose that's why nobody's called me out yet. And remember: always eat your liver sausage with a spoon. ~ Good tidings! ~ 05:11, 11 Jumbly 2015 (UTC)

..."so he saw me leg off, pulls me liver out and nails my head to the floor".

"He nailed your head to the floor?"

"At first, yeah." (kaizum me) 05:59, 11 Jumbly 2015 (UTC)

Hoy hoy

Are you Hispanic? My heritage is French-Canadian, so answer my question and we'll be even, son. Yo. (kaizum me) 15:33, 12 Jumbly 2015 (UTC)

I am half Hispanic and half Filipino. But you would never even tell that I'm half Filipino, so let's just stick with Hispanic. 2+2=5 (Tay | Say) 19:15, 12 Jumbly 2015 (UTC)

That's really cool. Do you speak any Tagalog? I worked with a Filipina who used to flirt with me in Tagalog, so I wouldn't know exactly what she was saying. I could tell she was saying things to me that she never would have said in English. We had a lot of fun. She's the only person I've ever met of that ethnicity. I did meet some others in passing when I lived in Okinawa, but never got to know anyone. There, most of my friends were Okinawan, or a mix of Okinawan, Japanese, Filipino, Korean, Caucasian, African-American, Chinese and many others. Cheers! (kaizum me) 23:32, 14 Jumbly 2015 (UTC)

Which dialect of Tagalog do you think she - oh, you couldn't understand her. Unfortunately, I do not speak any Tagalog nor any other dialect. My dad said that he was from Kalinga Province, so I would probably speak whatever dialect they speak there.

Should you meet another Pinoy (Filipino) person, I can only give you one piece of advice: Filipinos are very, very friendly, and Filipinos my around age are very, very weird. My girlfriend is 100% Filipino, and her family gladly accepted me when she introduced them to me. Heck, they even made me dinner and let me stay over for the night. It did get a little weird when I overheard her parents discussing marriage plans for the future, and I doubt it was for my GF's older brother. Sjink. 2+2=5 (Tay | Say) 00:05, 15 Jumbly 2015 (UTC)

Ask about EDSA. XY007 ⊡ talk ⊡ contributions 07:40, 15 Jumbly 2015 (UTC)