Illogicopedia:Werewolves

“You have a problem with authority, Mr. Anderson. You believe that you are special, that somehow the rules do not apply to you. Obviously you are mistaken. This wiki is one of the most totally awesome wikis on the Internet because every single editor understands that they are part of a whole. Thus if an editor has a problem, the wiki administrators have a problem. The time has come to make a choice, Mr. Anderson. Either you choose to respect the wiki administrators from this day forth or you choose to find yourself another site. Do I make myself clear?”

~ Mr. Rhineheart

“Quiet and motionless, I can slightly hear it, and repeatedly this has saved my life on the streets!”

~ Francis E. Dec on the presence of The Administration

“Listen closely youngins, for you are about to hear the tale of the deadly and poisonous Administrator Rex. Hi mom, I'm on Illogicopedia!”

~ Computer God on the The Administration

The Administrators... (otherwise known as "The Illogicopedian Pantheon of Infallible GODS", and/or "Werewolves") Always present, always lurking, ready to spring out of the dark and consume your very soul when you least expect it; their dark, evil conspiracy threatens the entirety of the world! These malevolent rulers of Illogicopedia implant their unsuspecting victims with Cheese Controls, turning them into carroting muppets that serve their sinister purposes! They are them; them are they.

	They are all in on it – they are in control of the entire world, and no doubt, we've all been kidnapped and brainwashed in our sleep! All in order to further the Adminati's nefarious schemes! But wait, I am one of the Adminati...? Aha! That's what they want me to think! Or maybe it's really... true? That explains it! Naturally, being part of it all, that explains how I know all this!
—Unknown administrator, commenting on it all

The Founders

Founders don't have any special authority more than regular admins beyond the title "Founder," which indicates that the site itself was originally their idea and they were here before anybody else. They're like the village elders or something - in that they're super old so their minds are probably gone.

Silent Penguin

Silent be the Silent Penguin, but do not let his appearance fool you, for he is the big-wig of Illogicopedia. He is the one to trouble if everything goes horribly wrong. Just PM him a few hundred times, then spam his letterbox a bit, just to ensure he gets the message. He enjoys squash, squish, tennis, and documentaries about funky animals. He once tracked down a user and gave them a massive chinese burn for insulting his Admin skillz, so don't do it!! He also owns half of Wimbledon.

Nerd42

Out of nowhere, Nerd42 one day appeared. His intentions as of yet remain a mystery, but all signs point toward something very sinister indeed, possibly involving selective self-reference and quite possibly arsenic flavour ice cream.

INSERT MANIACAL LAUGH HERE - MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Dudecalmdown

Administrator dudes

Who are they, then, you ask? Well, here follows the sinister truth of the matter; here follows the list of the Evil Ones.

Hindleyite

Hindleyite, otherwise known as Myra Hindley, is Uber Insane and will eat your sandal, regardless of reason. He is a master in all martial arts, especially Déjà-Fu, Okidoki and Pungchiomamma. Claimn't that he is inferior to the other admins, or he will prove otherwise!

The Divine Fluffalizer

The fluffiest of them all, The Divine Fluffalizer - when not furthering his evil plans - zips through the wiki when you least expect it, adding plenty of markup and linking in the process. The infamous mastermind behind the original introduction of cheese to the wiki, he wields a mean gory cat. He has been rumored to eat unsuspecting users, though this has yet to be confirmed.

Asema

The asthma-sending, very evil, mad scientist. He is the one who makes the cheese work. Out of nowhere, like Nerd42, but later, Asema appeared in a fireball heading towards Illogicopedia. He got promoted to an administrator when he willingly gave a Chinese Burn to himself and survived. Or so they say, the history may be different altogether! He wields a mean template, and sends legions of Garrote Carrot clones at his enemies. He rids people's offended eyes... of vandals. But then again, so does every other admin. In short, he's an average admin, just less insane.

Emperor Metalflower

Dundundun

Testes

Testostereich was just the seventh Spartan to enter the Illogicopedian Alumini. Hailing from the pornfields of the google serenghetti, Testicles was originally christened as "sir Reginald Wincest", but had to change his name following a violent altercation with a lemur. Captured just off of Safe Search, he was brought to Illogiland as an intended souvenir from Hindleyite's safari. However, left unsupervised Testicles managed to escape from the boot of Hindley's jeep, and after trying to mate with the washing machine made himself admin.

It took the sysop a while to adjust to his newfound powers. But the existing elite persevered, and after months of yelling "Sit!" and "Rollover!" they eventually succeeded in weening him off biting the main page. Now fully house-trained and boasting an edit count the size of a good country marrow, Testostereich spends his days musing over newbs and IPs, banning and molesting family members where he sees fit.

THE

THE wandered in to Illogicopedia one day, completely nude, with an unidentified slimy object protruding from his mouth. He has since become a regular Illogico contributor and admin, although most people agree that his hamster's writing skills are far superior.

Readmesoon (Rimsmesoon, RMS)

At this point, our friend here RMS has become too much of a lazy arse to edit anymore. Perfect time to become an administrator!

Athyria

Athyria was an Uncyclopedian who recently found herself kidnapped and forcibly dragged to Illogicopedia, where she suddenly saw a squid and chased after it. Nobody's quite sure what happened after that due to the ensuing large mess that destroyed most of the records, but it can't have gone too horribly, since according to this messily-scrawled napkin, she's now an admin. Or possibly a ladle. It's hard to tell, and apparently she doesn't know, either.

SHE'S ALSO (questionably) FEMALE. This is big news for the 99% male population of single males on ?pedia, starving for a shot at a female, no matter how unsure they are whether she's a real ladle or not.

Gruntled

Antlers?

Gruntled was an early user, admin and UnNews chaplain for Uncyclopedia until the plethora of penises became too much for his delicate nature. He applied for and received refugee status at Illogicopedia, and has made absolutely no impact since he took up residency. His writing is ok, for the most part. Some influences include Monty Python's Flying Circus, Firesign Theatre, Comedy Central programing, the Bible, Frank Zappa, marijuana and cheap monster movies.

Likes: cooking Asian style foods, writing weird shit, mailing belching hyenas to Athyria and reaching puberty.

Dislikes: dicks, narcissists, people who aren't as smart as they think they are, spilling his coffee, deadbeat dads and robots who don't know their place.

Marzipan

Contains nougat.

XY007

A prisoner of the rules of society. Somehow, after making a series of small articles, and getting started out, went from being banned from TV Tropes ('cause he wasn't allowed to write vanity about his own science fiction story), to becoming an admin on this wiki. And all I say is sjink.

Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive

It actually does.

Massive Gays Illogicopedia of the Month Award Winners

WOTM winners gain the ability - otherwise limited to admins - to do quick rollbacks.

Fonchezzz

A reformed referee, Fonchezzz worked briefly as a pizza tester before moving onto a career as a clown impersonator. Stumbling across the Infomatic SuperMario, Fonch (as nobody likes to his friends like to call him) brought forth the fourth Illogicopedia party, Ducks for Ducks. The ducks rejoiced. Everyone else clapped politely.

HelloolleH

Upon graduating from the Alaska school of pure insanity, Olly, as his enemies sometimes call him, found employment in the excessive category industry. After a short period as a cheese and onion crisp, he was eaten.

Ryan

He won ?pedian of the Month one time. Then he got PHANTOMSHIP!

The end.

Dxpenguinman

One day, in some strange place, a penguin was born, and he was deluxe too! On defeating the Alsakananan army from Articskas, he changed career to a life of crimeillogical-ness. Oh yes, and he likes milk.

Huge bob

Huge_bob was originally a Nazi named Binclin. He was INSANE. Now he is Huge_bob, almost as insane. He thinks The cows are acting suspicious and there's a guy named Gary Sanchez. Also, as seen right, he is a cyclops. Why is he here? I really don't know. He likes to write weird articles like Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart and Prehistory. So respect him as a phantom. A phantom with one eye!

Some WHAT!?

Weird. Why is he on here?

T3canolis

One day T3canolis showed up to Illogicopedia. He decided to make some articles. Everyone hated them. He remains on Illogicopedia even though he gets death threats daily.

Raggle Fraggle King

He is the king of Raggle Fraggle. Our researchers have yet to find out what that is but we assure you it is something awesome. He is most noted for his creation of Flub Nugget, one of the most influential articles ever made.

Anotherpongo

What?

BenBlade

Not much is known about BenBlade. Stay away at all costs.

The Bard

He's Canadian, eh? He likes to write music and poetry, and pretend to be a news anchor. Just smile and nod and back away slowly toward the nearest exit.

DarkGenome

An English chap with a chip on his shoulder.

TheOddity

This user was once here. Then she wasn't. And now she's back again! She enjoys the Irish, and other various things. She is super specific as well.

CartoonistHenning

Following a heavy night's drinking Silent Penguin found this poorly animated Norwegian abandoned on Illogicopedia's doorstep, face wet with his mother's milk and bundled up asleep in a curtain. Originally intending to boil him down to a fine paste he could put in articles Seppy stopped his plans after hearing the sheer volume of languages the orphan could speak. At only two he was already fluent in Norwegian, Swedish and even a bit of Icelandic. This impressed Seppy, as it ranged far beyond the average Illogicopedian's capabilities of newbspeak and basic grasp of english. Deciding his kids would dine on fish again as they did every night, Seppy kept Henning as a pet, in the hope that one day he would grow into a beautiful lady penguin Seppy could run away with. Unfortunately at the age of 7 Henning evolved into a Metapod, and later into an old man with a beard at 10. Bitter, and stuck with an albatross he didn't love Silent Penguin exiled Henning to Artigpedia, where he remains to this day.

Another n00b

Huh?

Frosty

The first and only snowman to win this award. Teh adminz on Uncyclopedia he uses the illogicopedia when he is procrastinating, waiting for lives in Candy Crush Saga, when extremely bored or when Awesomedecks says something hilariously quotable on facebook that he must turn into an article somehow. For 99% of unfinished articles on Illogicopedia click this button here because he sucks at finishing anyth...

Awesomedecks

Unlike most users, this one is somewhat mistrustful of Uncle Pete and hence wasn't really on there in the first place. She is a prolific vandal of Illogicopedia and whiteboards, and will often be the first to ask "what does this button do?", resulting in horrific edits and unintentional rollbacks.

Sophia

Wow

After I've been blocked and unblocked several times in Uncyclopedia as TigerManCP, The JoJ, Strangehal and Mackiebaron, I became a Potato and signed up to ?pedia as Lord Sophia of Fruitland. I became the first to win an award for Best Potato of the Year. Then I tried to invent Atinlaypedia on ********.Info under the name of Dilly, But due to its lack of users and articles, The wiki (Atinlaypedia) failed and it was shutdown for eternity. I was now evolved as a Golden Potato Banana. I changed his name to Her Majesty, Queen Sophia IV of Fruitland then Her Majesty, Queen Sophia III of Fruitland then Her Majesty, Queen Sophia III of UncycLand A.K.A. Uncyclo-Tan then Her Majesty, Queen Sophia III of UncycLand and finally Sophia, The Resident of Uncyclopedia Delty. Then, Another IP invasion broke out, all Illogicopedians made a dark turn, and blocked all vandals.

Iamawesome

Oh yes, I am. Everyone agrees. DO YOU!?!?!?!? I know you do because I have tamed Bcbkye.

Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive

2+2=5. Defies logic (hint hint), doesn't it? Well, in that case, you can easily guess how this mathematical genius came into being (no, not when a mommy bear and a daddy bear... well, y'know...) and would eventually rise to prominence in this magical realm of CARP and cheese and bananas and FNURDLE!!! 2+2=5 (as this sadistic user also goes by) actually came to being when he discovered some British band called Radiohead and decided to look up results on the internet on them. 5 minutes later, he joined Illogicopedia and wasn't noticed or even WELCOMED by the incompetent excuses for human life forms that inhabit this dank fallout shelter (wait... why is the ceiling glowing?) until a month later by Awesomedecks! All things said this user is here to stay so he can devour all of you blue cheese (even the one ones that are actually green. He loves being poisoned by strangers). He may also attempt to steal your collection of pickled alien fetuses that you got from some jerk from that country with a weird name, so until then, kill your heroes!

Watanabe Wannabe Admins

Flameviper

Not technically an administrator, but he's good friends with Seppy (he actually calls him Seppy in polite conversation). And has a giant sword attached to his anatomy.

	DON'T FECK WIT 'IM M8!
—Flameviper on himself

Insane Guy Racecarlock

This guy is insane!

Colonel Sanders

Ghost of a capitalist chicken mongerer. He may be teh adminz at RationalWiki, but he ain't good enough for Illogicopedia. And don't read this non-admin's artikles. They suck.

Island Monkey

This lunatic is ban't for socking on WP and regularly performs the sport Barras-bashing. He has turned into a lazy retard after making out too many one liners. He has the front-line experience on fighting vandals and will assist at your command.

Iamawesome

I AM A WABDEV AND THEREFORE I SHALL BE AN ADMIN!!!!!

Dr. DUuH

Hi. I'm Dr. DUuH, president of beer. I want adminship bc I'm mainly familiar with MediaWiki's software 'n' stuff, lol.

Also when I say "Pat's ass is not hot", Pat, is the root wort. :)