User:Gruntled/Talk archive 02

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Yay, good job, Mr. Batmoose! The muffins sing for you.

Ta ta. ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 1 Ditzimber 2010 - 01:45 (UTC)

Also, you might want to write in something for yourself here. ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 1 Ditzimber 2010 - 02:15 (UTC)

Thanks for sticking this stuff onto my page. You like me... you really, really like me! Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 16:49, 1 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Do I? Do I really? HMMMM? Okay, so I apparently do, but I would have done it anyway. ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 1 Ditzimber 2010 - 18:40 (UTC)

Eh?

Good sir, are you the one moving such monstrosities as Hindleyite's userpage to idiotic titles? If so, admit it right now or I'll call the banning police! Put 'em up!--Teh Chicken Magnate, The Honorable Colonel Sanders 18:19, 2 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

No, it's not Gruntled... just some vandal that likes to move things around. Shows up from time to time on Uncyclopedia, too, but so much less confusingly there... ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 2 Ditzimber 2010 - 19:15 (UTC)

Why would I do such a thing? Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 05:49, 3 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Perhaps he just doesn't like you. It's possible, you know... *narrows eyes suspiciously* ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 3 Ditzimber 2010 - 18:51 (UTC)

That may be it *wrinkles forehead, squints, belches* Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 20:25, 3 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

May not be, too. But the real question is... what do you have against mustard? ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 3 Ditzimber 2010 - 22:52 (UTC)

Gruntled, it's not that I don't like you. My apologies for falsely accusing you, but the only reason I did is the fact that the vandal's userpage redirected to yours. Sorry. And Athyria, what is this thing you call mustard?--Teh Chicken Magnate, The Honorable Colonel Sanders 01:33, 4 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Apogees accepted. Syzygy preferred. Sphincter unclenched. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 05:39, 4 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

The vandal's userpage redirected here because said vandal stole his userpage and moved it around a bunch the last time, including through its own. And mustard is just this... this glorious, glorious stuff... *goes all dreamy-eyed* ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 4 Ditzimber 2010 - 02:38 (UTC)

That bastard! Mustard thievery and user page hide-and-go-fuck-yourself are offensive to we and our ilk, in general. This shall not go unavenged! I hope. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 05:39, 4 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Er, actually, the mustard thief was me. ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 4 Ditzimber 2010 - 17:46 (UTC)

You never cease to exasperate me, my dear. I shall cancel the napalm mission against your location, now that I know it would be you cooking. As for the user page hide-and-go-fuck-yourself perpetrators... no mercy! Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 20:15, 4 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

No, no, by all means, let it be - I could use the napalm. After all, what proper batch of beer-soaked beef aint properly charred, eh?

No mercy, indeed. Fortunately, this place does have admins... sporadically. ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 5 Ditzimber 2010 - 08:23 (UTC)

“The poodle bi-ites... the poodle chews it...”

~ Frank Zappa on on this place and admins

Scary. ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 7 Ditzimber 2010 - 01:37 (UTC)

Yes I am, when I'm off my meds... Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 07:56, 7 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Why would that be? Also, since I just found your talkpage again, I have to say hi to it. Hi, talkpage! ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 8 Ditzimber 2010 - 01:47 (UTC)

Because when the pain gets to me, I mutter foul curses in Ukrainian. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 15:28, 8 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Why Ukrainian? ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 8 Ditzimber 2010 - 19:10 (UTC)

It was a somewhat random choice. I am sure that my code has somehow pre-compiled a list in memory for selections, and if SQL compliant, a table of categories. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 04:27, 9 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

It's funny. Folks say the only truly random input is user input, but how random is that, anyhow? The brains are designed to put things in patterns, regardless of how sensible. I mean, we're here, what does that say about our brains? As to SQL-compliant, I'm sure it could probably be ordered to be so. Unless it does a few odd things that ain't replicable? ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 9 Ditzimber 2010 - 08:19 (UTC)

The concept of randomness feels too big to fit in my mind. I think my understanding of it has gotten deeper, but is still comparatively infantile. Maybe I'll win the lottery, and get to go study physics and math the way I've wanted to. Then I can be a little less vague on the concept. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 02:35, 10 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Would it clarify, though? Or would it only become bigger, more elaborate and intricately convoluted? Perhaps you would become less vague in general, but I have noticed something strange about comprehension - the more specific things become, the more remains unknown. The more we see, the more we realise lies out of sight, and the more utterly intangible reality becomes. The more randomness lies unchallenged. I love physics. ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 11 Ditzimber 2010 - 05:14 (UTC)

I miss the wars and madnesses of elfwood, and this is as close as I can get...

Although, admittedly, Illogicopedia is strangely similar in some regards to what we wound up doing on Elfwood, anyhow. At any rate, I came here to...

*leaves a completely pointless comment* ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 9 Ditzimber 2010 - 08:18 (UTC)

I imagine some of it has to do with the familiarity and friendship that develops as you got more involved being elven. Maybe a way to look at it is to say that ?pediacity is a natural continuation and outgrowth of your earlier experiences. If so, then this iw when and where you belong.

*leads a pointless existence* Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 02:35, 10 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!--Teh Chicken Magnate, The Honorable Colonel Sanders 02:43, 10 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Thank you for that insight, Sir Chhichken Person... more illogic... this is good. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 02:45, 10 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Very good.--Teh Chicken Magnate, The Honorable Colonel Sanders 02:48, 10 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Indeed, very good. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 03:32, 10 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Quite.--Teh Chicken Magnate, The Honorable Colonel Sanders 03:35, 10 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Veddy veddy good. Jolly good.

(I don't even know what you guys are talking about, and am too lazy to check.)-- (Talk) (Contributions) 03:54, 10 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

And I also just miss the sheer, unadulterated insanity. The people were crazy, and I never even appreciated it at the time. Then again... could just be memory playing tricks again. This place is certainly nice, too, but I just don't see a proper war happening, you know? Maybe that really was a one-time thing, though... how often does that happen, a mad Tasmanian and a mad Canadian get into a roleplaying war of the linkes of which only fantasy writers can do... feh. ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 11 Ditzimber 2010 - 05:56 (UTC)

It was insane? I feel slighted, like, we're not insane enough. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 22:51, 11 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Well, you might be... and a few others... but where are the rest?! We need more Aleister-level insanity. Now that guy is epic... ~ Athyria • Lyrithya • Isarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms) • VFF • FI • IotM • AotM • TSR • OotP • GS • PR • RW • AM • WAE • QD • VFD • Vital • AfC • 500 • TLA -- 11 Ditzimber 2010 - 23:29 (UTC)

Hey!

I haven't left a message on your new talkpage yet!

...

Now I have.-- (Talk) (Contributions) 03:53, 10 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Asides

Happy Deathcember, happy new year, and happy yesterday. I hope the madnesses are treating you well, mon. ~ 03:03, 31 Ditzimber 2010

Thanks, and back atcha, albeit a bit late on the flipper. I spent four days before Christmas in hospital, and have been doing so-so ever since. So, here I am, albeit so-so. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 14:33, 20 Jeremy 2011 (UTC)

Oh dear... hope this passes as well. (Yes, it took me this long to read this far. I plead being asleep. Guuh. But that passes easily... poor dear, get more better, damn you!) ~ 18:44, 20 Jeremy 2011

By spring, I hope all the leprechauns are dead. Then I can start walking on a regular basis. Thanks for caring, and for the bacon-wrapped bats. Delicious! Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 14:52, 21 Jeremy 2011 (UTC)

Giant Banana Phallus

I just called to say I love you congrats on the feature Testostereich • (ballsack) 01:17, 5 Jeremy 2011 (UTC)

Yay! You gots a feature! ~ 02:25, 5 Jeremy 2011

Thanks to you both for recognizing the pinnacle of my achievements of this year. Now, congratulate me for having summoned the energy to reply. Cheers! Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 14:30, 20 Jeremy 2011 (UTC)

Energy is strangely useful, yes... can you get more, perhaps? Eat the funnily textured gelatin? Oh, feh, It's hopeless, innit... So tired, myself, right now... urg. ~ 18:36, 20 Jeremy 2011

I'm hoping that dark energy insinuates itself into Flargen's and Dingle's (Flargen and what?) into an identifiable juxtaposition (with what, I do not care), such that we may discern whether God's existence is indeed necessary. Nes pas? Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 14:48, 21 Jeremy 2011 (UTC)

I can't help myself; I have to disagree. That would hardly be optimal, as making such a thing necessary negates the meaning. If you know the reeds are there, what's the use going out to collect them? It's winter anyway. ~ 22:37, 22 Jeremy 2011

Whuh?

Nice to see you back, though that elf on your nose seems a bit suspicious. Welcome!--Colonel Sanders/Colonel Battaleaxe 22:09, 22 Jeremy 2011 (UTC)

What about the ducks on his head? ~ 22:38, 22 Jeremy 2011

Yes, and the snakes on his feet...--Colonel Sanders/Colonel Battaleaxe 22:40, 22 Jeremy 2011 (UTC)

Perhaps we should avoid making sudden movements... ~ 23:20, 22 Jeremy 2011

Thanks. Colonel. The elf in question is now living in St. Kitts, the ducks are now in my head, the snakes have retreated into my ankles due to the cold. No sudden movements is still good advice, Athyria. Now, off to desecrate the front page. Zulch! Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 03:10, 23 Jeremy 2011 (UTC)

In... er... crap? You should stock up on gohper repellent, too. Really. You should. And desecrate the front page? o_O

In completely unrelated news, Spike seems to want to talk to you. He's on IRC. ~ 03:48, 23 Jeremy 2011

Can you help me?

I am trapped in a sailboat somewhere in the mid-Atlantic, it's nighttime now and the ghosts have come aboard. They speak your name, grunttttlleed ggrunttllleeddd, and I ask them who they are, and they say Susan and Dave. They may be fish, although they seem too slimy for that. So please, send whatever ectoplasmic waves or whatever you are known for, and disperse these messengers. I am tired, and must sleep before the storm comes. Aleister 23:o5 8-2-'11

You can defeat the ghosts by ignoring their enormous penises. They say grunttttlllleeeedddd because they have a learning disability, and smell like lilacs. If the fish is a fish, reverse direction in a triple preternatural smeghead maneuver while biting the hand that feeds you. If the newspaper is late, don't leave a tip next time. This should help until I arrive on a chariot of fire. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 01:24, 9 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

Mind if I hide here for a bit?

There's something out there. I'm not sure what, but I don't like the feel of it... just... I just need to stay hidden. ~ 06:26, 9 Farbleum 2011

I know............THE WORLD HAS LOST COLOUR!!!!!! EVERYTHING IS BLACK AND WHITE!!!!!!! *starts to whine* Sincerely, islandmonkey - go speak 08:33, 9 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

Athyria: You may hide in the cabinet where I keep the severed heads of my enemies, if you like. Otherwise, I'll have to fly you out to the villa in Corsica. Berty, all the colour has fled to the UK. I suggest you hunker down with a keg and a flagon, maybe sharpen your arrowtips, come over and dust off the severed heads later? Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 15:43, 9 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

Yay! I'm still colour! Sincerely, islandmonkey - go speak 15:54, 9 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

You're orange. ~ 17:45, 11 Farbleum 2011

No, I'm red and white. Sincerely, islandmonkey - go speak 09:37, 12 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

No such thing as white. Your green outshines your blue. ~ 17:42, 12 Farbleum 2011

Quite true when it comes to my Spartan on Halo Reach. Sincerely, islandmonkey - go speak 08:29, 14 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

Z'him Monns...

Collaborizer? ~ 17:12, 13 Farbleum 2011

Eh? Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 17:23, 13 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

Are there bats that live in caves? ~ 17:31, 13 Farbleum 2011

Yup, quite a lot in fact. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 17:40, 13 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

What about giant frogs? ~ 18:05, 13 Farbleum 2011

If the giant frogs are tree frogs, I suppose we'd need giant trees. In a cave, though? Sufficient for infidels, but not up to ?pedic standards. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 20:33, 14 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

Well, there are giant trees in the caves... ~ 01:37, 15 Farbleum 2011

There goes the neighborhood. On another note, triceratops bondage? Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 22:28, 27 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

Oh, what? Er... no, can't say it has. ~ 05:41, 9 Arche 2011

Put that down! I didn't say you could have that one. 24.61.112.73 23:43, 9 Arche 2011 (UTC)

You just don't like my drats, do you? ~ 01:07, 10 Arche 2011

Collab?

Are you interested in an Illoginews collab on the situation in Lybia?--Colonel Sanders 21:58, 27 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

You mean Libya, right? Or maybe the country of Labia? Got anything started, or anything specific in mind to start with? Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 22:27, 27 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

Hope it's not too late, but I do have an idea scratched in a notebook somewhere... Let me find it.--Colonel Sanders 01:08, 10 Arche 2011 (UTC)

I guess we forgot this one. But, since Libya is irrelevant, if you are still interested, we can collab on one about the debt ceiling or something.--Colonel Sanders 02:05, 20 July 2011 (UTC)

P.S. I have RfA in the works as well, if you are interested in that appeal. And weak sauce.

hello!

can you remember me! උඹට මොකෝ! 17:24, 28 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

dont treat me like this :( උඹට මොකෝ! 17:28, 28 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

Didn't we meet at a Portuguese cook out at Orkney? You were wearing a hat in the shape of Bolivia? Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 19:14, 28 Farbleum 2011 (UTC)

Whoop" That's snuffler boots!!!" ™ -- 23:50, 8 Arche 2011 (UTC)

Filipno groondaugage freeups macjudiciary quon greeble. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 05:04, 9 Arche 2011 (UTC)

Whoa bee-caps off ta you badness. Mulled wine in the storage box... -- 16:47, 9 Arche 2011 (UTC)

Hubble M62, Rupert Murdoch is gay. Sincerely, islandmonkey - go speak 16:53, 9 Arche 2011 (UTC)

Alligators reaching escape velocity in 5... 4... 3... 2... and... now. Tail section has separated... palindrome engine has ignited... and we are a go for Project Zebra Ambush. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 23:41, 9 Arche 2011 (UTC)

Gates of up to date air... cranium cleanser and a mineral pump. To my dear Australasian aunt, go hang a steering box taped to the sand. ZEBRA HERDS illuminating LIGHTNING WRIST BANDS!! -- 12:38, 10 Arche 2011 (UTC)

I have an Uncle Bert - I have an Uncle Bert; and he's worse. Sincerely, islandmonkey - go speak 16:57, 10 Arche 2011 (UTC)

I have to ask.

I looked, but the lint was eating me. Are they blue? ~ 05:26, 29 Arche 2011

We're supposed to get our dog on April 9. Her name is Snowflake. Nobody here will let me rename her Frunobulax. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas

What's wrong with 'Frunobulax'? ~ 10:17, 30 Arche 2011

Zim_ulatrix and MicroZim_ulatrix objected on the grounds that they and the dog will probably have trouble remembering it or even pronouncing it. I see their point, and was given the option of naming our next dog Frunobulax; that can be "my" dog. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 02:57, 8 Arply 2011 (UTC)

And when will that be? o__o ~ 17:14, 16 Arply 2011

According to the deep laws of the cosmos, training one puppy every twenty years is probably enough of a good thing. Still, I may register Snowflake at City Hall as Frunobulax... I saw an iguana fart in a bathtub. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 10:41, 5 Yoon 2011 (UTC)

My computer thinks its name is Achilles, but it's actually called dhcpp5. Two names is enough, is it? Doesn't the iguana change anything? ~ 07:38, 6 Yoon 2011

Yes, two names is fine. If you plan to advance to the finals, though, you'll need at least one more name. Catholics are encouraged to use their confirmation names. Jews, Persians and South Koreans may substitute mono-sodium glutinous flowery twats, replete with John Cleese references and nucular fusion. The iguana, sadly, has passed. It did live a good, long life, especially after we gave it to this crazy person (who is possibly a cousin removed, hopefully by a number of degrees if so). I'll have the blue cheese dressing, please. Cheers! Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 17:52, 8 Yoon 2011 (UTC)

One shot of coconut syrup coming right up, love. I've always had a problem with names, though. Too many or two few, depending on what it is. My virtual machines keep all getting the same name, and my little dream who burst flouncily into the scene has too many... and she's only one. One of many. ~ 02:01, 9 Yoon 2011

I understand that the coconut will help my psychic medications by attuning the Thames onto my superimposed Chi spots. I'm already feeling more unsevenable. Anyway, I choose to look at is as gravity is pushing me down towards the relatively large center of mass. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 03:43, 11 Yoon 2011 (UTC)

But gravity always wins. Is that where you want to be? ~ 21:38, 11 Yoon 2011

You are obviously not the Zen mistress Sun Tzu-like oracle that you think you are. Or have I confused you with Fly Doo-dee-doo? Irregardless, gravity and we are not engaged in any sort of contest, where a winner is declared. I also suspect gravity isn't a "force", as we think of EM, strong and weak forces. I'm considering invoking the Hutchison Effect to back up all my future theories of everything. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 15:44, 13 Yoon 2011 (UTC)

You Know

The only reason I wrote The Roberto Code was because I was bored and Had nothing better to do other than write a Illogicopedia article. ( ﾟдﾟ) - Another_n00b 18:42, 8 Arply 2011 (UTC)

You need not make excuses to me for your horrid little experiments, dear sir. I was merely pointing out that an article written about a subject near and dear to our hearts here at ?pedia should be of better "quality". With regard to the title itself, it's genius. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 18:07, 15 Arply 2011 (UTC)

Badness and doom. ~ 17:15, 16 Arply 2011

Oh look

Say, gruntled, how's the liver cancer going? —rms talk 21:17, 5 Yoon 2011 (UTC)

He's got liver cancer? That's sad. But seriously, does he really?? - Another n00b 21:29, 5 Yoon 2011 (UTC)

Nah, no cancer that I know of. Still, I'm no spring chicken anymore. Age and self-abuse have taken a toll on my tender frame, not to mention car accidents. Actually, most of my problems lately have been back pain related. There is the mystery of the vagarious nerve, but it seems to be under control. Thanks for your concern, and the cream-style corn sculptures. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 02:49, 6 Yoon 2011 (UTC)

Gruntled! Nice to see you again. I've been working on a bunch of crap, and now have a place to test it out and see it fail! Come on by, I'll promote you to 'crat out of jest. So, where have you been?--Colonel Sanders 03:05, 6 Yoon 2011 (UTC)

I once

had a friend who I roomed with and knew for two years in college. After I graduated he came to see me, must have been six months later. He said he remembered me a little bit, but not much. Many of his memories had been burned out or erased or changed into things by two solid months of taking LSD while living in the mountains (I've never advocated LSD or what passes for it. Mushrooms and pot, yay!, but the others noooooooo. 'cept peyote, only had that once.). So I feel like that coming to visit you, who I hardly can recognize and approach with incense and beads (I then sell the beads and buy more incense). So, hello, again. Aleister 2:47 12-Yoon-2011

WAE

Vote. I nominated your student loans thingy. And, my new artikle as well. What ye think?--Colonel Sanders 15:20, 2 Jumbly 2011 (UTC)

I'm confused. Would you consider making the instructions on the template more nonsensical? Neither of these articles are actually the "worst I've read" by a long shot, so I'm thinking, you ought to define "worst" differently. I can't think of anything, but I'll let you know if I do. Thanks for the nom, anyway. Any publicity is good publicity. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 15:25, 2 Jumbly 2011 (UTC)

It's basically articles you think are crappy. As for the template and instructions, Athyria did those. And I think that new artikle I did is possibly the worst: it has a Glenn Beck quote!--Colonel Sanders 15:27, 2 Jumbly 2011 (UTC)

Like I said, I don't these are anywhere near the worst articles. I've got at least 20 worse than student loans. Careful of Athyria; this may all be a setup for a fall. Cheers! Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 15:30, 2 Jumbly 2011 (UTC)

Yes, she is a sneaky one. Though she has spent an unusual amount of time on Uncle Pete. Perhaps this is my worst article?--Colonel Sanders 15:33, 2 Jumbly 2011 (UTC)

The site is back up!!!!

Don't be sad, be glad, because Illogicopedia is back up and open for business!!!!

If Illogi leaved here tomorrow

Would you still remember it?
For Rpberto must be travelling on now
There's just too many wikis he's got to DDoS

But if he stayed here with us, Roberto,
Things just could be the same
'Cause ?Pedia's free as a bird now
And this wiki you cannot change
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

Bye bye, baby, it's been a bitter love yeah, yeah
And though this feeling I can't change
But please don't take this so badly
'Cause Lord knows Roberto's to blame

But if he stayed here with us, Roberto,
Things just could be the same
'Cause ?Pedia's as free as a bird now
And this bird you cannot change
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

And this wiki you cannot change
Lord knows It can't change
Lord, help me, It can't change

Lord, I can't change
Won't you fly high free wiki?

Yeah

This horrible copypasta message is brought to you by: - Another n00b 21:08, 9 Jumbly 2011 (UTC)

Yay! Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 21:34, 9 Jumbly 2011 (UTC)

Darn ol' n00b forgot to end his <center> tag. :P Hey, did you get my message? ~ Dan the Hedgehog aka Kahless the Unforgettable • The Happy Spaceman • TheHappySpaceman • DanTahHedgehog • YouTube • deviantART • TheHappySpaceman.com • info • discussion • contributions 04:02, 07/26/2011

An idea for a collaborative epic

Hey Gruntled! I haven't done any EPICs on Illogicopedia, nor any collaborations. How about we make one? I was thinking it would be one similar to Ghostbusters about my previous sig taking over Illogicopedia and haunting everybody's pages, and some protagonists or something would have to fight it to teh death. ~ Dan the Hedgehog aka Kahless the Unforgettable • The Happy Spaceman • TheHappySpaceman • DanTahHedgehog • YouTube • deviantART • TheHappySpaceman.com • info • discussion • contributions 03:58, 07/26/2011

P.S.- How does the title "The Cursed Signature of Dan the Hedgehog" sound?

I must apologize because I cannot seem to get excited about that idea, especially for something as challenging as an epic. Other than hating your idea that, I am up for the challenge of collaborating with you on such an adventure. I must read more of your stuff to get an idea of how I would like to proceed. Please have patience, as my space-time Gormagon equivalency juxtapositon is not stable... yet. Cheers! Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 12:26, 26 Jumbly 2011 (UTC)

Okay, but just so you know, I've been banned from UN again, so I have an entire week, and probably more. Not like it matters or anything. Also, don't mess with Kahless. ~ Dan the Hedgehog aka Kahless the Unforgettable • The Happy Spaceman • TheHappySpaceman • DanTahHedgehog • YouTube • deviantART • TheHappySpaceman.com • info • discussion • contributions 05:00, 07/27/2011

Scratch that-- I was only banned for two hours. Luckily I don't spend that much time on UN anyway, lol. ~ Dan the Hedgehog aka Kahless the Unforgettable • The Happy Spaceman • TheHappySpaceman • DanTahHedgehog • YouTube • deviantART • TheHappySpaceman.com • info • discussion • contributions 18:30, 07/27/2011

Pickle

Hi Zim,

Sadly, according to the "Rules and such", you can only submit one article. However, you can strike out your first article if you wish to switch categories. ~ The Bard of Illogicopedia 19:42, 29 Jumbly 2011 (UTC)

I noticed that after I entered my second, when I actually read the contest rules. Corrected, I will leave my original entry, thanks for the heads up and all the fish. Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 19:55, 29 Jumbly 2011 (UTC)

Best of luck. I got clobbered last time, so I'm curious to see who nails me to the wall this year. =) ~ The Bard of Illogicopedia 20:04, 29 Jumbly 2011 (UTC)

Just so you know...

I voted for your image File:Gas costs an arm and a leg.jpg to be a featured image. I tried to vote with my sockpuppet, but they wouldn't let me. ~ 02:08, 07/30/2011

I wish I could take credit for more than find it, but thanks and cheers! Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 02:18, 30 Jumbly 2011 (UTC)

Mmm, you do find good images, but they're not the sort for FI. But you knew that. ~ 04:24, 30 Jumbly 2011

Zackly. Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 14:15, 30 Jumbly 2011 (UTC)

Winner

Hey Zim,

I've updated Template:FeatWriter with a lame attempt at humour. I hope it's not too disagreeable to you. I like the new nick, so that was the inspiration for the theme. That, and acknowledgement of the insane amount of rather insane writing you do here and on the blog. So, congrats.

I do admire your work. My reason for not voting for you was to favour the n00b who hadn't won before. I think you won last year? Anyway...

Best,

~ The Bard of Illogicopedia 19:30, 5 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

Thanks for the kind words you've wafted in my general direction. I found it somewhat erudite, humourous and/or humorous, illogical and inflationary to my sense of self-worth. I guess I have been one of the quantitatively flatulent here and on the blog lately, but I will deny all of it in any court of law.

It's very kind of you to say you admire the "work". As for your choice of voting, I find your reasoning sound, and would have done the same in your position... which disturbs me. Having even that much in common with me could be a warning sign. Perhaps you should seek out trusted therapists or clergy... of you could become a Zimizmist and damn yourself eternally. Cheers! Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 17:55, 6 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

I could be worried... but instead I'll choose to interpret it as a sign that I'm hanging out on the right wiki, with the right company. :) ~ The Bard of Illogicopedia 18:28, 6 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

Always good to meet a fellow delusiona person. Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 18:04, 7 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

ZIM

Zim zim zim zim zimmity zim. Come back to Uncyc. -- >> Hello, my name is Sir Lollipop, and I am Canadian! 19:23, 8 Ergust 2011

Why? Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 22:32, 9 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

Makes more sense for Lollipop to come here. ~ The Bard of Illogicopedia 22:49, 9 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

In an illogical, roundabout sort of whey. Brinksmanship is what's called for here... like in Cuba, when the rains stop. Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 13:56, 10 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

IllogiBlog

You need your own sign off phrase. Because copying Keith Olbermann's ain't gonna cut it. Any ideas?--Colonel Sanders 20:56, 12 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

I know nothing about Keith Olbermann, except that he's a talking head, so I have no idea what you're on about. Cheers! Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 01:43, 13 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

In some post or another of yours on da blog, you said Good night, and good luck. That is Olbermann's line. You need one of your own.--Colonel Sanders 03:54, 13 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

I used to say, "This has been Reverend Zim_ulator for UnNews... thank you for suffering" at one time. Maybe I'll do a variant of that. But then, I'd have a catchphrase... most inappropriate for ?pedia... never mind. Cheers! Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 13:18, 13 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

Colbert Super PAC

Did you see the ads for Rick Parry?--Colonel Sanders 20:36, 24 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

Yes, I saw them a couple of hours ago... fucking hilarious! Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 20:41, 24 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

His entire show is. Too bad it's in reruns this week.--Colonel Sanders 20:46, 24 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

I understand Parry with an a got over 900 votes at the Iowa Straw Poll. I promised my vote to Santorum, had Bachmann pay my cover charge, and then ate this guy working a dunk tank. Being a good Catholic, I couldn't help but "feast on the Lord", as investigative reporter Sid Roth just told me. Say, does Santorum come out of polyester fabrics? Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 15:14, 25 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

Actually, them bastards at the election thingy have yet to say whether Parry or that impostor Perry received those votes. As for Bachmann, she was too busy celebrating Elvis' birthday that day, and Santorum was trying not to be a frothy mixture. And Palin was too busy eating fried butter on a stick. But I have already pledged my vote and soul to Ron Paul.--Colonel Sanders 01:20, 26 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

I heard Ron Paul's tent had fried stick on a stick. Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 01:32, 26 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

Yes, and it was delicious. And Santorum had fried santorum on a stick.--Colonel Sanders 01:34, 26 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

“Santorum? You're soaking in it!”

~ Madge the nail girl on santorum's effectiveness at hardening fingernails

Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 01:50, 26 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

Mr. Grunteloons

May I inquire after your head at the wall? ~ 15:28, 25 Ergust 2011

Sure, if I may inquire as to what you're talking aobut? Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 15:42, 25 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

I was hoping you'd know. ~ 20:24, 25 Ergust 2011

If this has to do with my porcelain theocracies, I never said they actually exist. Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 01:03, 26 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

But they got blood on them. ~ 01:23, 26 Ergust 2011

The grunteloons, or the porcelain theocracies? Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 01:30, 26 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

The latter. They look as sad as the mad girl's poor penguins. ~ 03:31, 26 Ergust 2011

Hmmm.... Porcelain Theocracies... Gruntled AKA Reverend Zim_ulator AKA Grunteloons - Exchange ideas 15:34, 26 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

Best 1950s comedy recordings evur

These are Stan Freberg's versions of "The Great Pretender" and "Heartbreak Hotel". Tell me what ye think about these obscure findings.--Colonel Sanders 00:40, 27 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

Sorry to spam your page again...

But what do you think of this idea? Bad timing?--Colonel Sanders 02:21, 28 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

It ain't spam unless I don't want it. Your article is OK, but doesn't make me quiver or anything. I think Cain is the funniest Republican hopeful, anyway. Cheers! Gruntled AKA Monsignor Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 02:30, 28 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

IOTM

Thank you, Monsignor! I confess that I am deeply disturbed, although at this point I fear that the only one I am really admitting this to is myself. ~ The Bard of Illogicopedia 17:22, 29 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

That would be true, if I did not exist. Wait... do I exist? This calls for further research. Thanks a lot! Cheers... Gruntled AKA Monsignor Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 23:46, 29 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

I gave Regis the same honor.--Colonel Sanders 23:53, 29 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

What?

Are you seriously reading that whole Bush article?--Colonel Sanders 01:23, 2 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

No, I can only take small doses... I may finish by 2016. Gruntled AKA Monsignor Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 01:30, 2 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

What ye think?--Colonel Sanders 01:35, 2 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

I think some of your stuff is Colbert derivative, and therefore, I've already heard it done better. On the plus side, it's content ;] Monsignor Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 02:16, 2 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

I think most of my stuff is Colbert derivative at least in some way. I am quite a fan, y'know. Maybe Wikiality would be a better fit for me?--Colonel Sanders 02:26, 2 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

Reagan is my new butt of ridicule. Beck and Schlafly have had their turns, though I may do another Beck one soon.--Colonel Sanders 02:00, 2 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

How about a collab on Jeff Foxworthy?--Colonel Sanders 03:12, 2 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

I may drive by there in a bit... Monsignor Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 17:36, 2 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

You Can't Cure Stupid

You and anyone else are welcome to create pages for it.--Colonel Sanders 18:51, 2 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

It dern't feel like the kinda ting fer me I'd to do. That's not to say it ain't true. Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 03:37, 3 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

I confess

I ate your dog. ~ 19:34, 2 Serpeniver 2011

Looking at my dog right now... I guess this proves that we've split into two separate universes... I'll miss you :( Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 02:59, 3 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

Something like that. But will you really miss her, seeing as you've never met her? ~ 04:34, 5 Serpeniver 2011

Definitely. She haunts my dreams with herds of fanged meats and midget walruses in cardigan sweaters... how can I not miss her? Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 18:27, 5 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

Well, it depends what kind of darts you use... real ones may have more accuracy than foam, you know? But foam are more effective for actual use. Have you tried darts? ~ 19:18, 7 Serpeniver 2011

Certainly, darts! I've recently acquired world-class atlatl skillz, and can now hit the broad side of a wolly mammoth. Thanks for the advice, and all the fish. Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 23:13, 7 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

And the drats. You may find one of those has taken over your sofa as well. ~ 03:16, 13 Serpeniver 2011

He ate mah pig.--Colonel Sanders 02:27, 3 Serpeniver 2011 UTC)

The bastard Romney! I was terrified while he was governor of my state. Now I'm just amused that he thinks he has a shot at presicent. Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 02:59, 3 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

On the contrary, Monsignor...

...your rewrite does me proud! Tremendously fun to read. =) Thanks for your great effort, the brilliant result, and also for sparing me the shame of having to read my own autobiographical blather for the next month. Your warped Canadian comrade, ~ The Bard of Illogicopedia 22:33, 4 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

You've certainly earned more than my meager skills could muster. It warms my heart to know that you are deluded kind enough to be swayed by such meager efforts. Cheers! Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 18:32, 5 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

Illogicomedia

You might want to think about creating an account there. It's no problem if you're a peddler like you currently are, but if you ever wanted to hold a staffer job or elected office, you would want one. They're less costly than air! And they're cleaner too!--Colonel Sanders 20:49, 10 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

Were I to care about such jobs and offices, I would certainly do so. *sigh* Let me explain... I am a power-grabbing sycophant with delusions of inferiority with no ego, a negative Id, a quantum chiropractic practice... do the math... this is how I do Illogic. You are welcome to perks, as you see them. I have no need of them. I am superior to you in 94 ways. That is all. I lied, there is more. You suck. You are certainly less hirsute of visage than I. I am Peaches. 24.61.112.73 22:00, 10 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

Okay... I was just making a friendly suggestion. No need to insult my existance.--Colonel Sanders 22:08, 10 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

I was having fun with you. If I wanted to hurt your feelings, I'd have invited you to gaze upon my horrifying face. Cheers! 24.61.112.73 23:22, 10 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

Spam articles

What do you think on how I redid them? Not really supposed to be hilarious or good in any right, but are they better than what these spambots originally grunted out? If so, I may need to invest in a new shotgun.--Colonel Sanders 23:34, 11 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

IllogiBlog

Thank you for your kind words on my insane ramblings.--Colonel Sanders 00:27, 13 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

You're welcome. I had fun with it. See you on the 29th... eat lots of lasagna while you're training. Cheers! Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 00:29, 13 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

OK. I'm also sitting on my arse watching the GOP debate while eating Godfather's Pizza.--Colonel Sanders 00:31, 13 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

That makes you... AWESOME!!! Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 00:52, 13 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

So.

Mind if I call you Wandrickson? ~ 15:49, 13 Serpeniver 2011

That would be fine. How should I feel about it? Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 17:14, 13 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

I was hoping you would know. ~ 21:56, 13 Serpeniver 2011

I suspect I'm OK with it. Does it come with an outboard motor? Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 22:10, 13 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

No, inboard. It's a problem when fish get caught in it. ~ 03:09, 18 Serpeniver 2011

Favour

Tough week for me. My nearly 14 year old doggie has stopped eating. We've done all we can and the hard choice was made. There's no way I'll be anything except a mental trainwreck come Saturday. Could you please make sure the ?times gets written? I'm just not up for it this week. Thanks. ~ The Bard of Illogicopedia 05:42, 15 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

I am with you in spirit. We've been through the same experience and know whereof you speak. And I will see to the Times and help where I can, if you need. I'll pop into irc from time to time as well, if you feel like you want to talk. You are in our thoughts. Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 12:23, 15 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

Still hurting. Doing a bit of writing but I'm mostly keeping to myself while I process the loss. Thanks, my friend. ~ The Bard of Illogicopedia 09:59, 18 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

Hang in there, and take comfort in what you can. When we lost Evelyn, even my crusty Dad called to offer condolences... that tells me it's not a small thing. We're thinking of you. Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 16:56, 18 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

And...

Why should I not do it??? –You have reached~ Message sent by Mnid, who is someonea person you can talk to. 23:46, 17 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

Because it's Thursday somewhere right now. Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 20:52, 10 Octodest 2011 (UTC)

Batgorilla

It's no batmoose, but I plead lack of imagination and good source images. ~ 00:58, 21 Serpeniver 2011

It is splendid! Thanks, love! Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 01:18, 21 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)

Frank Zappa

“If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library”

~ Frank Zappa

...since you seem to have a recent obsession with him.--Colonel Sanders 01:46, 9 Octodest 2011 (UTC)

Not an obsession as much as he's one of these people I consider unusually gifted. I have been a supporter since 1977. As a musician, I appreciate his virtuosity. As a writer, I appreciate his wit. As a composer, I admire his superlative creativity. As an iconoclast, I applaud his presence in the pantheon of musical history. And, he's so fun to quote! Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 20:31, 10 Octodest 2011 (UTC)

Yeh he's good but I personally only like the orchestrated version of black page and night school. -- 19:29, 25 Octodest 2011 (UTC)

Hold your horses! It's the Illogicopedian Times!

11th Edition

Rebelling from Wikia in the worst kind of way.

Tuesday, Ditzember 27, 2011

The Illogicopedian Times is, in mathematical terms, the square root of the hippopotumus when divided by pi and raised to the power of your mom. This will have mathematicians baffled for the rest of the year, which, coincidentally, isn't very long.

Happy New Years By Dan the Hedgehog As we end 2011, let's look back on the dumb things that happened during the old year: The rebirth of your mom jokes The featuring of cheeses The screeching of Justin Bieber The death of ED (wait, that's not dumb, actually that's a good thing) The rebirth of ED at EncyclopediaDramatica.ch (that, however, is very dumb) The birth of the Illogicomedia Foundation The horrible love of MLP:FiM The vandalism of ACarThatDrives This Illogicopedia's five-year anniversary and 8,000+ articles The rebirth of the IllogiTimes Needless to say, however, after 01/01/2012, the "new year" will quickly become the old year, and then we'll be waiting for 12/31/2012. It's just a neverending cycle... or is it? I'm sexy and I know it. By Sexy And you're ugly. Let's make average babies.

Oh damn. By NotReallyMyUsername We are facing the IllogiPocalypse. This is an apocalypse of Illogicopedia. You see, our wiki is slowly but surely slowing down to obscurity. And the only editors who are still visiting it are Dan the Hedgehog and I. Our forum isn't visited enough, neither is VFH, VFI, AotM or even IotM. And look at this: Dan and I are the only ones who even bothered to write an IllogiTimes since October of this year. And this will slowly degrade until we are barely noticed at all, even behind EncyclopediaDramatica.ch. And then, on December 21, 2012, our website will disappear from all history. Completely. Please, we must save our website. Cool story bro. By Dan the Hedgehog Please, everybody completely disregard what my friend Kirby up there said. He's just one pile of **** after another. Thank you.

WANTED: Certainly not you. Come on, who needs you? Nobody. You're pathetic.

Write for The Illogicopedian! Submit a story!

LOST: My job. Wish I could get it back. I also lost my life because I'm on death row. Pitiful.

~[ths] Keeper of the Bloodwine 22:59, 12/27/2011

Big Brrother

I regret to inform you, but non-contestants are forbidden from commenting in the Hoose, save they be Uncle Ben. Otherwise, Koopas may carry their adulterated corpses from the Hoose and feed it to Jamaican citizen-slaves. The link for commentary for you is here and I have taken the liberty of moving your comment. To vote, use that email on the banner thing. 9-9-9: the solution for EVERYTHING!--Colonel Sanders 20:39, 1 Jeremy 2012 (UTC)

999... that means Manx needs women. Cheers! Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 03:48, 5 Jeremy 2012 (UTC)

Talk page message

You gottsa gottsa feature. Enjoy it, it is hands down the best thing anyone will ever achieve in life Testostereich • (ballsack) 17:53, 10 Jeremy 2012 (UTC)

I would second this, but I know someone who once managed to make Simon Cowell say 'dog's bottom'. Now, whilst this article is pretty awesome, a 9.5/10 in fact, that incident was solid 10, and will never be topped. Except by this article, because I just decided it is better. Congrats! -- Hindleyak  Converse • ?blog • Click here! 18:58, 10 Jeremy 2012 (UTC)

Thanks, dudes. I forgot I wrote this. Still too logical, though... Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 01:39, 11 Jeremy 2012 (UTC)

Now with free cheese wizzy! It's the Illogicopedian Times!

12th Edition

Formerly known as "Jerks Without Borders"

Thursday, Jeremy 26, 2012

The Illogicopedian Times is... er... I don't know. Seriously! I don't! But I do know that a lot of people suggest that you read Playboy instead because it's funnier. Whatever. Why am I still typing here?

Big Brother 2012 By Dan the Hedgehog It is nearing the close of Jeremy 2012, and also nearing the close of Big Brrother, Illogicopedia's game show that is actually a revival of another Illogicopedia game show from 2008. In week 2, as Island Monkey and Another n00b got the boot, now it comes down to the final three contestants: Dan the Hedgehog, Colonel Sanders and Athyria. Who will win and join the house of Big Brother... permanently? See the action here. Also, don't forget to vote for your favorite user to WIN. Illogic Times to be Published Monthly By Dan the Hedgehog, again Since The Bard and everybody else abandoned it and Kırby and I are the only ones editing it anymore, it is my decree that the Illogicopedian Times shall be published monthly! Basically, the only reason I'm making this announcement is to tell you all to WRITE SOME FRIKKIN' STORIES!!!

Recent Threads By the forum guys The sig challenge! Jeremy's almost over and the logo hasn't changed! Androidness! I'm not We do Spoiler: Colonel's winning. Whuh? Am I even supposed to be here? Baby New Year??? By NotReallyMyUsername Happy New Year 2012 everybody! You know those posters with the "baby new year" and the old year is an old bearded man? Well, I think those posters are very morbid. I mean, think about it: “Congratulations for the new year! Think of this year as a newborn baby who will be dead in a year's time.” ~See what I mean? Just something I put in here to fill up space By the only one who ever edits this thing anymore VFF! VFI! IotM! AotM! ICA!

WANTED: Everything in the bank! This is a robbery! Wait... this is a nursing home? Whoops, wrong building.

Write for The Illogicopedian! Submit a story!

LOST: My sanity, ever since I began reading Illogicopedia.

~Runner-Up 00:50, 01/27/2012

Inauguationary Congratulatory Messageatory Suppository

Congrashmulations on the inauguration to the ultra-seekrit Werewolf group. You are no longer a peasant like myself, which reminds me a quote by Saint Ronnie Reagan:

“The nine scariest words in the English language are 'I'm from the government and am here to help'.”

~ Saint Ronnie Reagan

Ahhhhh, you're getting the IRS after me! Oh noes! MAYDAY!

Anyway, congrats again and please don't tax me to oblivion. I like in a cardboard box by the elementary school for God's sake!

Half-assedly,

--Colonel Sanders (talk) 13:57, 29 Farbleum 2012 (UTC)

Both confusing and touching at the same time, by which I mean stop trying to cop a feel. --Silent PenguinLeave Me Alone 18:12, 29 Farbleum 2012 (UTC)

Seppy: HAH! Cheers! Monsignor Onslow Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 18:15, 29 Farbleum 2012 (UTC)

I mean not to make such advances, Seppy. Begone with ye putrid beak. Monsignor, what I mean: don't be like this guy and make me lose my business! It's my livelihood. Or something. I dunno. Eh?--Colonel Sanders (talk) 11:41, 1 Arche 2012 (UTC)

FIX YOUR SIGNATURE!

Please.

I mean, make it link to your userpage, will ya, love? Needs a link=User:Gruntled parameter, is all. ~ 04:14, 31 Arche 2012

Agreed. ~Runner-Up 22:22, 03/31/2012

Agreed! 14:26, 1 Arply 2012 (UTC)

Grr. *insect twitchy noises* ~ 18:22, 1 Arply 2012