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Germany i.jpg Sausage.jpg
(Flag) (Coat of Arms)
Motto: "Ich bin ein Berliner"
Anthem: Deutschland!
Capital Berlin
Largest city Hamburger
Official languages Deutsch
Government Federal Parliamentary Republican Democratic Official Monarchy of the Dictatorial Oligarchy with Fries
Prime Minister Jurgen Klinsmann
National Hero(es) Almighty Eszett
Currency Euro
Religion Bratwurski and deutsch pastafariasm
Population 82,000,000
Area Central Europe, Eastern Pacific
Population density 50kg/km
Ethnic groups Germans, Austrians
Major exports Sausages
Major imports Syrians
National animal Eszett
Favourite pastime Digging holes in the road and filling them in again
Opening hours 9-5 weekdays
Internet tld .ja
Calling code 0800-JA-DAS-IST-GUT

Germany is a nation in Western Europe. As a result of some stuff that happened in the early 20th century, it is a country in a perputual state of apologising and feeling guilty about things. Their people are well known for their efficiency & devotion to work, though the concept of free time was recently introduced to Germany, and the population have increasingly become aware of activities such as laughing and smiling.

Although God likes everything, he most certainly doesn't like Germany. He apparently thinks it is gay, much like many countries nowadays. However the Germans especially so for their effeminate war uniforms and lederhosen.


Throughout history, Germany has been a bit unlucky. In fact, there wasn't really a proper name for them until the 1900s. They lost both World Wars (despite the best efforts of head coach Adolf Hitler the second time) and were split into two countries until 1989, when some idiots accidentally fell onto a wall in Berlin. The fall of the wall was much to the displeasure of the neighbours to the East, who no longer had a back yard to smoke illegal cigars or engage in illegal booze production in.

Today the country is lead by Angela Merkel, who tries to be friends with everybody but upsets people in the process. Such is life.

Name confusion[edit]

A large population of germs live in an entirely unrelated place also called Germ many. The confusion that comes as a result of this has meant that the bacteria are looking for a new name, though the short-lived change to 'Dirtchland' proved to present the same problems.


Germaspace is the new version of space being made by German lab rats working under extreme conditions. It's sort of like the ol' Nazi concept of 'lebensraum', except on an intergalactic level. Problems with planning permission mean the project is currently on hold until someone can work out whether lightyears is a unit to measure distance or time.

German language[edit]

Germany is a country of German Es. And also the country of German Knees. Yeß indeed.

See also[edit]