Digging holes in the road and filling them in again

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Freshly dug hole. In a minute some guys will come along and fill it in again.

Digging holes in the road and filling them in again (Also known as DHRFTA by people who don't believe in words shorter than four letters) is a sport invented by the people of Scotland. It is thought to derive from the ancient practice of filling in holes, then digging them again.

In modern times, up to four workmen may cordon off an area of a road on a bend or a major junction and dig a hole, leave it uncovered but cordoned (until local students steal the signs anyway) for up to seven months. The exact time is presumably of cosmic importance, and calculated by recruitment consultant mystics. The exact reasons for doing this are of some debate. Some believe that it is to allow the spirits of the road-builders ascend to a higher plane of existence, others believe it is done to annoy cyclists.

Best estimates for the first hole to be dug and filled in, are around 7000BC in a place close to Glasgow however some among you may ask if there were roads in 7000BC. Recent research suggests not, however the theory remains under debate and currently being researched into by Godd (he got addicted to crack that year), because what ever he decides goes, and a 9000 year old goat claims to have seen the incident. The fad, meanwhile, has been spreading out of control and has now reached the suburbs of Edinburgh.

Modern revival[edit | edit source]

The sport was almost all but forgotten for centuries, with the advent of the more difficult to dig corduroy style roads and carriage paths. Fortunately, it had not completely disappeared, as some teams had formed in the suburbs of Miami and Philadelphia who played the sport in all its original glory.

With television coverage on MTV and Setanta Sports, the sport regained popularity, and orange-uniformed teams have been formed in cities everywhere worldwide. Advances in equipment for the sport have brought about such innovations as the Orange Blinky Barricade Flasher (commonly held as a prized trophy).