Smarch Madness

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Comic Book Guy after losing to Homer in the 1st round of Smarch Madness.

In the history of our monotonous and meaningless lives, there are two tournaments that give our human race one single reason to get their fat selves out of bed everyday. Oddly enough, both of these tournaments go by the same name, Smarch Madness. On of these Smarch Madnesses is the NCAA cricket tournament in the month of Smarch, and the battle tournament between Characters from the Simpsons, which for some reason occurs in August. However, before we get to the tournament, it is crucial that we talk about the disease known as..SMARCH MADNESS DISORDER!

About[edit | edit source]

Smarch Madness disorder(SMD) is a disorder that is common during the months of Smarch and August. The cause of this disorder is the many Smarch-Madness related television broadcasts and 30% off sales at your typical department stores.

According to a medical study at the University of Springfield, the typical symptoms of SMD are:

  • Frequent wearing of team colors
  • Non-stop television watching
  • Entering bracket pools
  • Screaming the name of your favorite player at least 25 times per day

If you have these or any other possible symptoms, please contact the University of Springfield Medical Hospital at (843) 665-2142.

Now on to the exciting world of College Cricket[edit | edit source]

Smarch Madness #1, as it is called in order to avoid lawsuits, is a 32-team NCAA cricket tournament in the month of Smarch. While the first through third rounds usually swap locatons, the Final Four has been played at the John Paul Jones Arena in Charlottesville, VA every year since 1896. The first ten championships were won by the University of Virginia, or UVA, which wasn't that hard seeing that they hosted all of those tournaments. UVA still leads all NCAA in cricket championships with 52 of them, including the last three from 2005-2007 under head coach Bill Parcells. Other typical favorites in the annual tournament include Michigan, Navy, Clemson, and UC Irvine.

Smarch Madness #2 (aka Simpsons Battle Tournament)[edit | edit source]

Smarch Madness #2 is an annual battle tournament between 16 characters on the Simpsons that has been held since 476 A.D. The event originated when Moe Syzlak really pissed off Homer Simpson by having sex with Marge. The result was a 12-round boxing match between the two, which Homer won ten seconds into the first round by KO. About 1500 years later, the sport of boxing really caught on in Springfield, and the tournament became an annual event. Unfortunately, Homer was so good at boxing that he kepting winning the event until Lisa Simpson took the crown in 2000. Since then, the crown has been won by Bart Simpson, Moe, Milhouse Van Houten, and then Lisa again, but she had to give it back to Homer because she tested positive for LSD and 3 types steroids.

See also[edit | edit source]