Creationism

'So like, there was all this total load of nothing all over everywhere, all up in the apartment, some of it had got in the back of the printer, the shit was everywhere. And my bitch KC, you know KC, you met her down at the uh, what was it, heaven that one time. So KC's been bugging me about it for .. musta been weeks, "you go clear that up God", "gee God it looks alwful dirty in here", "still havent cleared up that nothing I see", and it was getting to me man. Getting to me. Anyway, I'm getting my head kicked in by this toal fucking bitch, and I'm like "Dude, Duuude, I'll do it, ok? Just get off my back about it." So I like go to the cupboard, you know the cupboard where I keep all my doobies and God stuff, and I'm all like pressing buttons and welding shit. Next thing I know, BOOM, animals. And then there's these little retard animals that don't move that came with it too, plants or something? The shit they gave me at the store must've been out of date. Anyway, the whole creation thing, it was fucking colourful man, I mean proper mushroom colourful, so I'm all like "Wuuuut?" and pass out. I sleep like 24 hours, 24 man, I was crazy wasted. I wake up half 4 in the afternoon and some little naked dude with a clover leaf over his nutsack walks out of nowhere and starts going on and on about the complete sausage fest it was down there, like it was my fucking fault? So I threw him down KC and punched him in the rib. Threw the box away after that and got a real job.'

'You sure you don't want a hit on this?'

Sure thing, man. Sounds cool.

Isms

See Also

• Evolution
• Religion
• Christianity