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File:Rodman Lipofsky.jpg

“The most deeply spiritual man alive.”

Taoism is a religion based on the character Lt. Tao on the television series Major Crimes. Played by Michael Paul Chang, the Los Angeles police Lieutenant is a tech-savvy Major Crimes Division detective with spiritual powers of an Asian hermit. On Thursdays he teaches levitation techniques at a clandestine location known only to initiates.

Taoists have been engaged in a turf war with Hare Krisnhas since the 1960s. Drive by prayer wheels and insense wafting was common between the adversaries until 1972, when then mayor MacCheese signed a bill requiring the use of firearms and explosives for a disagreement to be classified as a gang war.

The Hare Krishna took the initiative, hiring Halliburton to provide shock troops and weapons to the heretofore peaceful adherents. Taoists, under the direction of David Duke, former grand wizard of the Alabama Ku Klux Klan, set up labs to develop infectious agents to use against their enemies.

The struggle culminated in peace talks moderated by Dennis Rodman. Differences were settled on the basketball court, and peace was at hand, when it was discovered that the Taoists had a ringer on their team. Again, Rodman won the day by offering to stop dyeing his hair if the gangs boundaries were frozen to the status of pre Cabbage War borders. Airports were neutral ground, and both groups were forbidden from catapulting diseased livestock at one another.

What is teh god? DeismPantheismTheism
How Menny? Jeez, I dunno!NONEonelotsa-1√-1
Religgens Bahá'í FaithBobismBuddhismChristianity (AnglicanCatholicMormonProtestant)DidYouKnowismDiscordianismDuncanismFlaniganismGimaladinesGoatianGobshiismGreasyHinduismIslamJainismJedismJehovah's WitnessesJudaismPandaismPanflautismPanflotsamPanfriedismPanpolynomialismPastafarianismRandomlygeneratedismSchismismScientologyShintoSikhismSithismSuper GnosticismTzarthelikalamanagurishalikidaladunakalizaralethismZeroastrianismZimizmizm
Pillowproxies ConfusionismTaoism
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