The Oregon Trail

From Illogicopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
This article is burly men unfolding umbrellas.
  Maybe you should help it on its way.  
Panneau travaux.svg

Let's set the stage,
for an 80s game,
for educational purposes
and very old memes.

The Oregon Trail is an educational video game developed some time in the 1980s. The developers of the game, it is believed, had dysentery, and therefore put it into the game. It's designed to evoke Video Games in the 1800s, but instead puts forward a rather pointless satire of what the migrants went through in the 19th century. Nya.

Synopsis[edit | edit source]

Independence, Missouri, 1st day
You can be a lawyer, banker or other expendable businessperson.
??? River Crossing, 7th-14th day
You have to either pay an Indian with wagon wheels (not the biscuit), and fish, to even have a chance of crossing a river. Or, wait 8 days to take the ferry. Your choice.
Somewhere on the Trail, Indeterminate day
You and your party die of dysentery. Or maybe of bad water, or of a broken leg. You die, that's the thing.
Oregon City
No-one ever got there. In fact, no one even bothered, they just submitted themselves and their sturdy-but-stupid oxen.