Forum:More than 500 Ways You Know You've Been on Too Much Illogicopedia

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You should know the drill because it's obvious. Add to the list and then add your name to the contributors so it is one list without breaks for signatures. T'anks 'cause this World War 2. --T3 19:18, 14 Yoon 2010 (UTC)

The List[edit]

  1. You wrote Melville Amsterdam under most admired in your high school year book.
  2. When asked for a famous person born in Guatemala, you answered "Flub Nugget."
  3. You did your biology project on the anatomy of fnurdles.
  4. When someone's like, "What's that writing award again?" you immediately answered, "Oh, the Pickle."
  5. You think you're getting IOTM when someone says you're getting an award at the end of the month.
  6. Your brain has turned into useless shit.
  7. Your browser's homepage is ?pedia.
  8. You invite friends to come along and join.
  9. You constantly link people to Illogicopedia pages that relate to the current situation.
  10. You add to the 500 Ways You Know You've Been on Too Much Illogicopedia page.
  11. You write "--~~~~" on YouTube comments.
  12. You own a collapsible ironing board.
  13. You won "Most Likely to Win The Pickle" in your High School superlatives.
  14. When you wake up at 8:30am on a Saturday in August, instead of doing something productive, you judge the Pickle.
  15. You notify your friends when you've written another EPIC.
  16. You get angry when you realize that only Testostereich has more articles than you.
  17. You sigh when you read your first few articles
  18. You've taken an actual writing assignment from school and modified it into an Illogicopedia article (I have)
  19. You've stolen more jokes than Carlos Mencia and Dane Cook combined.
  20. You always keep Illogicopedia open as a second tab (next to YouTube o' course).
  21. You get excited when England is about to play the U.S. in the World Cup because you actually know British people to talk smack to.
  22. You've nearly broken your "F5" button due to repetitive pressing on Recent Changes.
  23. You downloaded Skype because RMS and Seppy told you to.
  24. You make your friends guess how many articles you have.
  25. You've been blocked twice.
  26. You attempt to use the word "FNURDLE" in a Scrabble game.
  27. You have more than 13 userboxes.
  28. You spend your spare time adding categories to your page.
  29. You've been on Illogicopedia on your laptop, desktop, brother's laptop, iPod, phone, cousin's computer, friends' computer, school computers, and your old phone.
  30. You've fnurdled your toot in a boot while stealing a shoot.
  31. You've found yourself thinking "T3canolis" whenever someone yells "FAIL".
  32. The first result in your browser's autocomplete in the URL bar when "I" is entered is the recent changes page.
  33. When you get home from school/work you immediately go to recent changes and sigh when nothing happened.
  34. You include your friends in real life on collaborations as much as possible.
  35. You copy all of your templates from the Lawn Order template and just replace the colors and words.
  36. You've contributed 50,000+ bytes to The Longest Article.
  37. You've been on for almost 2 years.
  38. You attribute all your shortcomings to too much time spent on recent changes.
  39. You consider changing the site logo for a penis a leisure activity.
  40. You have to break up your article page into sections because there are too many articles.
  41. You have a page dedicated to articles you've written.
  42. You have people make 500 reasons explaining how they know they have been on ?pedia too much, and they all apply to you.
  43. You beg your friends not to quit the site.
  44. You get impatient while trying to teach someone wiki coding.
  45. You like big butts and you cannot lie.
  46. You other brothers can't deny.
  47. You scoff at the works of newbies, regardless of how good you secretly think they are.
  48. They say illogical, you hear Illogicopedia.
  49. You give hookers a Chinese burn for not giving head on demand.
  50. You spend so much time on recent changes you can still faintly see its outline when you close your eyes.
  51. When you wish to remain anonymous you call yourself Bcbkye.
  52. You have dreams about getting features.
  53. When you get raped up the arse you think of Seppy.
  54. You use Johann Sebastian Bach and David "TasselHoff" HasselHoff as everyday verbs.
  55. You have strapped Hindleyite down, and malked him like the damned dirty dog he is
  56. You have at some point shown extreme disdain for Uncyclopedia, despite having achieved practically nothing compared to them, and being a member of a much much less popular wiki.
  57. They're still gay though.
  58. You, like Phrubub, nose the cheese.
  59. You think Cockbeast! has some actual value.
  60. You fail to edit day after day, even though you check the site every day.
  61. Active on both sites, you accidentally create and article meant for Uncyclopedia on Illogicopedia shortly after accidentally creating an article meant for Illogicopedia on Uncyclopedia, yet neither get deleted.
  62. Instead of doing your coursework with a pencil on a sheet of paper, you do it on your computer and append it to The Longest Article in the hopes of getting it long enough again.
  63. You name your newborn baby Jeremy Farbleum.
  64. Housemates tell you you've been verbally (and sometimes otherwise) cursing Testostereich in your sleep.
  65. You just ate a "Delicious Boote Mill Sandwich", then finished the ?pedia article you were working on.
  66. Bcbkye lives under your bed.
  67. You spell existance with an a.
  68. You learned the definition of vanity from Illogicopedia's Policy Page.
  69. You add one unfunny point to the end of a huge list, and then list yourself as one of its main 'contributors'.
  70. You cite Illogicopedia as a source in a Wikipedia article and then wonder why it gets tagged as needing more sources.
  71. You spend an hour trying to think of something to add to this list and cannot think of anything.
  72. Whenever you encounter a database error anywhere, you blame Roberto.
  73. When you see a large "I", you draw a banana with it.
  74. You actively post updates on the Illogicopedia Facebook group.
  75. When people ask who your favorite super hero is, you gladly proclaim the Slightly Below Average Man
  76. You see everything here as a FACT! Wikipedia is wrong about everything anyway.
  77. You decide that because you are an Illogicopedian, you are subsequently entitled to the 'Useless Gobshite of the Month' award on Uncyclopedia, and when they point out that that makes no sense, you threaten to throw a koala at them.
  78. After a time, you decide to recreate/copy one of your Illogicopedia articles across to Uncyclopedia... only for it to be placed on VFD within hours.
  79. You find yourself constantly talking about/referring to Illogicopedia in real life, making people think you're a bit weird.
  80. When you have gone on Hiatus... even though you don't have a job...
  81. You have entered a deep depression because all of your ducks have left you.
  82. When on Facebook, your Political Views read either Apathy in Action, Strangled Cat Party, Illogicrat, or Ducks for Ducks...
  83. Your user account names/passwords involve Aid Epoc Igolli.
  84. You automatically fix the double prefix error when creating new forum topics or feature nominations or whatnot without thinking about it.
  85. You know what the double prefix error even is.
  86. Your children move to a country that has never heard of Illogicopedia.
  87. You are gang raped by a roving bunch of wallabies.
  88. Your clothes smell of marijuana, mutton and polyurethane floor sealant.
  89. People who you think are crazy, think you are funny and pretty cool.
  90. You bragged about some Illogicopedia award you've won, and are disappointed that your parents disowned you.
  91. The gravitational constant changes.
  92. Bing Crosby appears in front of you in line at the checkout, and beats you with a bag of sweet Valencia oranges.
  93. You have been collecting your own bright green urine in mason jars.
  94. You create a Forum topic on Illogicopedia.
  95. You start calling yourself 'Wincest' when you date your cousin.
  96. Pigs fly.
  97. You read through this list, think you see a repeat, reread through it, think you see another repeat, forget what the original was, and then read through again...
  98. You forgot what an admin is.
  99. You were online during chrimbo.
  100. There are at least 100 500 Ways You Know You've Been on Too Much Illogicopedia.
  101. One morning, instead of going on ?pedia like usual, you go on Uncyclopedia and promptly get banned.
  102. Whilst watching Parliament, you find yourself wondering what happened to that lovely Duck Party.
  103. You try to set your MSN friendly name to 'Slightly below average man' but misspell 'average'.
  104. You incorporate Phrubub nose the cheese into your everyday vocabulary.
    BardBot edits faster than you.
  105. With the exception of a couple of token edits and freak signups, you own Recent Changes.
  106. You keep making token edits instead of showering and going to work like you were supposed to.
  107. When you look away from the monitor, you notice that "The Bard" has been burnt into your retina from looking at recent changes too much.
  108. The internet at your workplace goes down when you're trying to view The Longest Article.
  109. You are trying to view The Longest Article at your workplace.
  110. You try to archive your Facebook wall as if it were a user talk page.
  111. When watching an Antarctic wildlife show, you are highly surprised when penguins actually emit noise.
  112. You actually believe Testistocles to be a Greek god.
  113. When on other websites, you have accidentally typed == == when trying to make headers, and also have been caught typing ''' for bold and '' for italics.
  114. You have been banned from Uncyclopedia multiple times for confusing the Poo Lit Surprise with the Pickle.
  115. In your dictionary, you're shocked to find out that there's no entry on Bcbkye.
  116. You are the only one who still edits this forum. (Ahem?)
  117. When preparing that report on global warming, you correct all instances of 'Epic Igloo' to 'Epoc Igolli'.
  118. In church, you accidentally say the God of Fried Chicken Drippings or say that Chuck Norris is the father of Jesus.
  119. You are excited on seeing users return after many years.
  120. You get depressed when the servers die.
  121. You prioritise checking Recent Changes over doing your homework or study.
  122. You come back.
  123. Whenever someone mentions Cthulhu, you imagine this.
  124. Whilst watching Planet 51, you expected the OMG Scary Alien to make a cameo appearance.
  125. You will arrive at work/school really sleepy because you stayed up until 5 reading Illogicopedia articles.
  126. You almost die from gas poisoning while attempting to read the article about gas in Illogicopedia
  127. When Xenosmilus powerbombs you to oblivion simply because the crowd chants "FEED XENO MORE".
  128. When it's 2014 and you're still here.
  129. You wonder at the church how is it possible for Jesus to hang on that cross without his trusty duct tape.
  130. When you hear the equation 2+2 you immediately think that the logical answer is 5 not 4 because of that pesky user Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive.
  131. You start to compare the articles on Illogicopedia to Uncyclopedia to see which ones are more lethal to your neurons.
  132. You tell your friends about it and they go to tis website more than Wikipedia.
  134. You dream of the day this list will have 500 items.
  135. Weasels ripped your flesh.
  136. You record the weekly sermons of your local religious leaders on your iPad to use as input for Template:Illogicopedia Snack Cake Analysis Module.
  137. You take the red pill and the blue pill.
  138. You can't stop tazing yourself.
  139. You start dreaming of suicide by spider cannon.
  140. Prostitutes and archaeologists stop you on the streets and try to sell you a watch.
  141. People start referring to your mom as, "that poor, poor woman".
  142. You start taking drugs to get you off the drugs you take because you've been on too much Illogicopedia.
  143. The bass player tries to kill everyone else in your band with his library card.
  144. You sell your credit card numbers on eBay for $1.88 American.
  145. Random strangers send you odd packages in the mail.
  146. You speak in tongues at AA meetings.
  147. You take up napping in the dishwasher.
  148. You start sweating WD40.
  149. Octopi start following you home from work.
  150. You can't recall whether you're gay or straight.
  151. Angry villagers catapult livestock at your house.
  152. You keep forgetting how to say "bald-headed chicken sodomizer" in Khmer.[1]
  153. Packs of old biddies seem to appear out of nowhere, and set to attacking you with bongs.
  154. Joining the local Communist party seems like a good idea.
  155. The idea of raining dead monkeys seems hilarious to you.
  156. Illogicopedians like your articles and encourage you to write more.
  157. You can't "push it real good" because, after all, this isn't the 90s.
  158. You keep adding items to this list.
  159. Ghosts fly out from your ass.
  160. There's not enough beer. There's never enough god damned beer.
  161. You're not facing the fact that you're addicted to love.
  162. Friends and family stage an intervention.
  163. You somehow manage to add another point like this after Illogicopedia has been taken off the Internet, which was on Thursday, April 2nd, 2015. It was a shame, really. I had joined in Farbleum 15, 2015, so I wasn't able to fully be a part of this wonderful website. By the way, this is User:Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive. At least I was able to contribute to it, but I was seriously hoping i could be a part of this website. It is a distinct honor to make the very last point on this forum (DESPITE THE FACT THAT WE FAILED AT REACHING 500 WAYS), but at least we know that some idiot once said, "All good things must come to an end," and he was right. Goodnight, Internet. 8 years (Illogicopedia [2007-2008]) and all of the sudden...BOOM! Always remember: 2+2=5.
  164. You quote Illogicopedia at Bible study.
  165. You notice you're being followed by knights in full armor on horseback.
  166. Elves break into your shed and sodomize your power tools.
  167. You get addicted to non sequitur pornography.
  168. Every time Roberto messes with the servers on Illogicopedia, you react the way that n00b that made way #163 reacted.
  169. You make fake Oscar Wilde or Captain Obvious quotes.
  170. You inadvertently joined the Ism Party.
  171. You use the months of the Insanity Cycle instead of the real months.
  172. You are a panda.
  173. You are an eeble panda.
  174. You claim that not only 2+2=5, but 3+3=7, 4+4=9, 4x4=12, etc.
  175. Every time you hear of Estonia, you giggle.
  176. You compare Euroipods to Click for free* holiday.
  177. you are an eeble sonk sjink fjink panda.
  178. Non sequiturs are your life.
  179. You have visited Kelana Jaya LRT station.
  180. You believe in brain medicine for anything Hindleyism.
  181. You went to Hindley.
  182. You dream of the day 'I'll ask the questions here!' SEASON 2 will begin
  183. You find rice and cats.
  184. You get a hamster just so you can put it on your keyboard.
  185. You bite your dog.
  186. You write African peach fan fiction.
  187. You ship real people.
  188. You make an entry to this list not starting with 'You'.
  189. You sing banana scat at Bible study.
  190. You have a working knowledge of Afrikaans.
  191. You aimed to contradict the total capacity of an Embraer 195.
  192. You have started multiple forums.
  193. You haven't bathed and eaten and urinated and defecated and talked and slept and blinked in the past 3 hours.
  194. You have uploaded several GIFs.
  195. You start talking in maths and buzzing like a fridge.
  196. Your property becomes infested with land sharks.
  197. You have skin lesions that are clustered together like a banana.
  198. You get eaten by worms and weird fishes tomorrow.
  199. Eeble sonk. Stot and pronk.
  201. Ip mip. Ip mip.
  202. You are slowly going insane through this site tomorrow.
  203. You get a panda.
  204. You accidentally sign your posts on social media.
  205. You say "carp" instead of "crap," or vice versa.
  206. 10 more people in the world now know about this website because of you.
  207. You try to make your waffles fluffier.
  208. You realize that Athyria might be how a lisp might pronounce "Assyria."
  209. You are banned from Wikipedia for "vandalism" but still make "vandal" edits locally from any device that you can get your hands on.
  210. Your daily routine is: Wake up, spend 1 hour in Illogicopedia, have breakfast, spend 1 hour in Illogicopedia, wash yourself, spend 1 hour in Illogicopedia, go to work, spend 1 hour in Illogicopedia WHILE "WORKING", work for 5 minutes, go home and spend the rest of the day in Illogicopedia.
  211. You have bookmarks for the history pages of all pages you have made.
  212. You also have bookmarks for all talk pages you have edited.
  213. If you type 'w' for 'www' in the URL bar, Illogicopedia's main page pops up.
  214. Your browser's start page AND new tab page are both set to Illogicopedia.
  215. You see Ed Miliband peaking out from your bedroom window
  217. A gif has been uploaded to the mindless sandalisms.
  218. You become addicted to rehab.
  219. You are part of the Order of the Paperclip: First Class.
  220. You think the Illogisaur was an actual dinosaur.
  221. You play IllogiGames all the time.
  222. Gargoyles are at the ends of your staircase.
  223. Your basement is twice the size of Slovakia. It also has a library, wine cellar, greenhouse, and a bunch of other things (to be confused with Warehouse 13.)
  224. You can't find drugs strong enough to stifle the illogic.
  225. The bats suddenly stop eating your legs.
  226. You start writing poetry about gelatin.
  227. Dragoon fork incredulously.
  228. The Illogisaur lives under your bed.
  229. Meek meek meek.
  230. My waffles are fluffy already.
  231. You giggle when someone mentions 'Minks' or 'Estonia'.
  232. The word "snarf" goes under the same category as "phrubub" and "fnurdle" due to my efforts.
  233. You think that Radiohead is an actual disease because of the user mentioned directly above.
  234. You think that all items in this list are true.
  235. You have a hexagonal indoors pool in the middle of your room.
  236. Impi impi impi.
  237. You eat marzipan for dinner (or waffles).
  238. Well well well.
  239. You start drinking.
  240. You use other people's usernames from this website on other things (games and other accounts and stuff.)
  241. It turns out to be over nein, nein, nein, nein, nein thousand!
  242. You learned German just to got to Kamelopedia and Stupidedia.
  243. You use these reasons for the "You might be a redneck" jokes.
  244. Water is no longer considered a chemical compound, but, rather, a juice.
  245. Umm...
  246. Your name isn't an anagram of Josef Stalin.
  247. Your name IS an anagram of Josef Stalin.
  248. You aren't HelloolleH despite half of your categories match.
  249. Hey 2+2=5 these were MY categories! Okay. You put other people's categories here.
  250. That wasn't 2+2=5 it was me.
  251. You use this forum as a place for chat, as demonstrated above.
  252. Ferrets ripped your flesh.
  254. You are a devout Hindleyite.
  255. I i i . You treach it.
  256. These entries make no sense to you.
  257. You don't know why you feel so tongue tied.
  258. You don't know why you feel so skinned alive.
  259. It's like your thoughts are misguided and a little naïve.
  260. You twitch and you salivate, like with myxomatosis.
  261. You are given the option of being put in a home or to be put down.
  262. You don't like smart-asses.
  263. It wasn't your intention, you did it for a reason (to add to this list).
  264. You start dancing with cripples and give them milk.
  265. You do card tricks for mafia geeks.
  266. "The light has gone out for you."
  267. You give 400 points to Slytherin.
  268. You realize that it wasn't a fart.
  269. The radiation being emitted by this list gives you diabetic ebolAIDS canceritis.
  270. You know your onions very well.
  271. You dram of being an admin.
  272. You have not realized that you are a sock of Jonny Greenwood all this time.
  273. In a fast German car, you're amazed that you survived; an airbag saved your life.
  274. You refer to 2+2=5 as either "the bear guy," "the Radiohead fan," or "the Salvadorian guy."
  275. You overdose often on brain medicine.
  276. You give up on adding to this list.
  277. You have now officially realized that you are a sock of Jonny Greenwood.
  278. You always add new pages to the 'Did You know' Section.
  279. You have added a request for a new language Illogicopedia.
  280. You've taken up drinking again.
  281. You list "Owl Exterminator" as your occupation.
  282. Rush Limbaugh thinks you're a pinhead.
  283. You get a get nervous when you find out an admin is a lactose intolerant cripple.
  284. Creationists are picketing at your front door.
  286. Your other drug of choice is a banana smoothie.
  287. You can't take the illogic anymore. That's why you joined Logicopedia.
  288. You accidentally repeat a reason several times on this list.
  289. Your mouse has caved in on itself and created a mini black hole.
  290. You eat Monsignor Peaches everyday.
  291. Illogicopedia has become your senpai.
  292. You're stuck in the bitumen.
  293. Donuts! DONUTS!!!
  294. Your spinal cord is now shaped like a banana.
  295. You blame it on the black star.
  296. You blame it on the falling sky.
  297. You blame it on the satellite.
  298. It's been 58 house since you last slept.
  299. Your potatoes are automated.
  301. Bullet proof vests are wrapped around your computer
  302. You wonder: "What the hell is this coming to?
  303. "You goes to arSes very often.
  304. You make frequent weasels and movie references.
  305. You see a mink in the zoo.
  306. You have a cup of tea with a moose.
  307. Eya eya eya!
  308. You have tamed a Bearterflyger.
  309. You are an admin on another site and use one of the awesome block summaries.
  310. Ewa di ventum.
  311. You express your love for the word 'vent'.
  312. You have a pet cat that also joins the site.
  313. Your pet cat wins RationalWiki's most boring troll award.
  314. Sonk ka-stot ka-rponk!
  315. You don't eat with your spoon, you only stare into it and wonder at the marvels of creation.
  316. You use Illogicopedian inside jokes in real life.
  317. You dress up as Slightly Below Average Man for Halloween.
  318. Kayen kahay!
  319. You are a devout Hindleyite and so are your friends.
  320. You got a rights promotion on Uncyclopedia.
  321. You have a vanity page and a personal vanity category.
  322. Templates are like weasels.
  323. You wonder where KJ24 is from.
  324. You got Conservapedia's account creation system disabled.
  325. You first edited as an IP.
  326. Tchinga.
  327. You use nonsensical edit summaries.
  328. You use no edit summaries.
  329. Zulch! Is the auto works! I'm telling you, that's where they take all the cars that they hurt.
  330. You make a myriad of references to Illogicopedia on your Wikipedia account.
  331. Uncyclopedia deleted your 12-year-old brother's account with them.
  332. The end is near.
  333. You address users directly by their username. For instance: "Hey <insert name here>! You're cool!"
  334. You ask for it with a cherry on top.
  335. Ahhh diddums.
  336. Ippala ippala.
  337. Centrifugal force.
  338. You worry about the clones of Flower Base.
  339. You've cancelled your subscription to the resurrection.
  340. You think that a glockenspiel is a dog-themed gun.
  341. You call hacks all day.
  342. Meowington Hax is now an elder user.
  343. Drip, drip, drop.
  344. You swat 'em away like flies, but like flies the bugs keep coming back.
  345. Dinosaurs still roam the Earth.
  346. Hue hue hue hue hue hue.
  347. The faust arp is now broken.
  348. Words such as fnurdle and snarf are now permanently part of your everyday vocabulary.
  349. They will suck you down to the other side.
  350. You try talking to inactive users such as Hindleyite.
  351. You liek bearz.
  352. You wish you could marry Illogicopedia.
  353. You get drunk on cheese.
  354. You dream of Recent Changes.
  355. You check your grocery stores for five day banana.
  356. You convert a spam page into a full scale article an call it your own, which is the case in Electrical Service Providers In California.
  357. Bjork is now an admin.
  358. U think dis website has no mlg refs... m8.
  359. When somebody is having a panic attack, you begin to wonder why they aren't wearing glasses and hallucinating wildly, before searching for the nearest wooden spoon.
  360. You plan on moving to Britain so you can watch the UK dub of your own life.
  361. The only thing you know Tim Whitnall for is his apparent ability to scream in coloratura soprano.
  362. You own two collapsible ironing boards.
  363. You make 40 articles on your first day
  364. You nominate yourself to IOTM, in an amazing display of vanity.
  365. Sonk fnord fa-fnord.
  367. You realise that this is your 2,000th edit.
  368. If you have been reading one way from this list everyday for one year, it's best that you stop here.
  369. Unless it was a leap year, you should've stopped at the previous way.
  370. You haven't opened the glory box yet.
  371. You want to die by being buried by a swimming pool full of tepid waffles
  372. You took over the world.
  373. You can find the square brackets on your keyboard more easily than the round ones.
  374. Athyria had to fix your userpage.
  375. You have completed the Riddler's Revenge.
  376. You forget to go in through the outdoor in the morning and go out through the indoor every time there's a zombie alien chicken apocalypse directed to the hospice your parents are in after discovering Kim Jong-Il actually donated a dog to Russia, not a god.
  377. You reflected why you signed up for a catheter in the first place upon watching Serpico.
  378. You've just been Gypped.
  379. In response to the collapse of Gap, you start Chasm to make things "broader."
  380. You let the genie out of the bottle.
  381. You think pomade is a combination of pomegranate juice and lemonade.
  382. You invent the Model ID-10t Robot.
  383. User: Fluffy Waffles voluntarily returns to Illogicopedia.
  384. You actually learn a little bit of CSS and HTML by copying and pasting like there is no tomorrow on Illogicopedia.
  385. You PhotoShop various celebrities and chuck 'em into an article.
  386. Your fingertips smell like sod.
  387. Perpetual motion never satisfies you.
  388. Users on Illogicopedia have grown tired of the abuse of the word "cheese."
  389. You wonder when the Finnish Illogia will ever be completed.
  390. You suddenly remember that this forum existed after a few months of not editing it.
  391. You think that Guillaume de Singe is out to get you.
  392. Smell?
  393. Other users like your articles.
  394. You invent new religions for no good reason.
  395. Your dreams contain belching hyenas and Enormous Fanged Hams.
  396. You start unconsciously listening to Radiohead.
  397. You start practicing "Chinese art and American girls".
  398. You run an IllogiBusiness.
  399. You fail the Cheese.
  400. 400 ENTRIES! :)
  401. You decide that people on Illogicopedia are boring, or not.
  402. You think that Smell? was weird because it was just one word.
  403. You buy Elemental Melons.
  404. You copy another user's music-related idea.
  405. You annoy a new user.
  406. You have ever told at least five IPs to create an account. Some did.
  407. You call yourself the Supreme Leader.
  408. You give members of your party a 25% discount at your business.
  409. You accept Valjuta.
  410. You have invented ever 230 religions.
  411. You create a religious text for someone else.
  412. You think of your obsession as your drug of choice.
  413. You realise that we're almost at 500.
  414. You correct other people's spelling unashamedly.
  415. You add both British and American spelling like reali(s/z)e.
  416. You're not 2+2=5.
  417. You're not XY007.
  418. You want ?pedia to be known publicly.
  419. One more time and it's a ferret for a ferret... a mink for a mink...
  420. You have dreams of editing Illogicopedia articles.
  421. You stop existing.
  422. You create an award.
  423. You win a Bowl of Steam.
  424. No cannabis jokes here please.
  425. You start an award and win it yourself.
  426. You are a dank meme expert
  427. You were convinced by your friend to get to here.
  428. You nominate yourself for IOTM on the 24th.
  429. You make orange jelly.
  430. You realise that seventy-five currencies to go.
  431. You feel the need to lend somebody's rocket boots, and then regret it immediately afterwards.
  432. You use 'shazam' or 'oh muffin crumbs' as a swear word.
  433. You attempt to clean your windows with a slice of pizza.
  434. You've turned spying on people into a daily habit.
  435. You name your first-born Raine Ondowne.
  436. The only French phrase you know is omelette du fromage.
  437. You associate spaghetti with royalty.
  438. You have considered publicizing Illogicopedia on 4chan.
  439. You suddenly realize the possible and extremely destructive consequences of publicizing Illogicopedia on 4chan.
  440. You actually bothered to see this censored sentence on this list.
  441. You don't know what "idk" stands for.
  442. You start watching deleted scenes just so you can get ideas to write a decent article or two.
  443. You've written a significant amount of content, only for it to be accidentally closed or wiped before submission, one or multiple times.
  444. You drink (hot chocolate) to forget these moments.
  445. You drink Ramune soda to forget the gaping hole that Bunnyhuggles left in your menial existence.
  446. Your favourite anime is Danny Phantom.
  447. More accurately, your favourite anime is Cory in the House
  448. You get tired of the overuse of MLG references.
  449. You apply for the Antler award.
  450. Things appear precisely the size they actually are in your mirrors.
  451. That's how hot, in Fahrenheit, the book with Guy Montag in it is.
  452. It's Halloween!
  453. It's November!
  454. Sophia was part of the Order of the Paperclip: Second Class.
  455. Sophia was part of the Order of the Paperclip: Third Class.
  456. Your favorite anime is Airplane Instructional Videos from the 80s.
  457. Your favorite Airplane Instructional Video is Cleared for Takeoff (1994)
  459. You zomgerd straight past logging in, because the first thing you check is the Recent changes ;D
  460. You know that the previously mentioned way is too true.
  461. Burn eyes burns eyes.
  462. Illogicopedia can't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
  463. The idea to Illogicopedia conceived from 2005 to 2006 and launched in 2007.
  464. You want to make a sequel to 500 Ways You Know You've Been on Too Much Illogicopedia.
  465. You know the history of ?pedia.
  466. You see Wackypedia as a rip-off of ?pedia.
  467. You restart a dead forum
  468. This page is gold.
  469. Warrior monkeys materialize in your living room and beat you like a red-headed rented mule's stepchild with brass knuckles and anchovy guns.
  470. You start a campaign to replace the national bird with the banana.
  471. You stopped taking hallucinogens years ago, but weird shit is still happening.
  472. Sophia edited AAAAA!
  473. When there's an ache in the back of your brain begging you to vomit insane words onto your computer screen, but you can't find the time, because university requires you to vomit sane words onto your computer screen all the time.
  474. Help me.
  475. T'anks 'cause this World War 2.
  476. Sophia ghosts an article.
  477. Sophia lost the war.
  478. You have significant trouble staying alive.
  479. You can tell by the way I use my walk, I'm a woman's man, no time to talk.
  480. Life's going nowhere.
  481. Somebody help me, again.
  482. You discover that your great-granddaughter from the year 2105 is likely to be covered in marshmallow.
  483. You order Germanese gherkin sausage at the local brasserie.
  484. You eat your soup cold.
  485. It eventually gets to the point where people start using this list for vanity, remarks, and whatever 'memes' are supposed to be.
  486. Without you even realising, you're probably a hypocrite.
  487. You want to be submerged in bread.
  488. You begin to make a living delivering spider telegrams, and encounter various personal injuries.
  489. You arrange to have your veranda assembled by Illogicopedia's local deck builder.
  490. You begin making cakes in 'day-old flavour'.
  491. You start the countdown here... (10)
  492. Your lists get interrupted by people starting countdowns, so you decide to interrupt their countdowns by continuing your lists.
  493. You attempt to talk to the melting puddle monkey.
  494. While doing your grocery shopping at Lostco, you find the cereal next to the motor oil.
  495. Your greedy manager's operating system is Micro$oft Window$.
  496. You're never quite sure exactly how to spell 'Dewey'.
  497. Phillip Seymore Hoffman occasionally gets a look in.
  498. I did.
  499. I do this all the time.
  500. There are at least 500 Ways You Know You've Been on Too Much Illogicopedia.
  501. You now throw a party because there are now 500 Ways You Know You've Been on Too Much Illogicopedia.
  502. They subsequently vote for you after all.
  503. True story.
  504. You start having hydrocortisone cream for breakfast.
  505. Little gremlins made out of kimchi and silicone lubricant stalk you at night.
  506. Your mother is an echidna and your father smelt of butt berries.
  507. You have ever smelled a museum in Oklahoma.
  508. You sоmеtіmеs sneak Сyrillic letters into your writing.
  509. All 30,000 spammers needs to be deleted.
  510. Did you know that due to the cosmological pressure on the stratosphere, solar beams constantly penetrate to our optic nerve systems?
  511. Were you aware that certain species, dating back further than the protozaic period, have gained the ability to prevent complete natural degeneration for longer than 1/millionth of a second?
  512. Had it crossed your mind that a certain brand of informational computation unit which has taken its name from the species of plant Malus pumila has gained relative superiority over other manufacturers?
  513. 1,234,567 bananas were killed in the Second Boer War.
  514. The first helicopter was designed by Howard Phillips Lovecraft.
  515. In reality, Alice never owned a looking-glass.
  516. Cats hate water but love fish.
  517. Crushing grapes will lead to whining.
  518. Purple is the opposite of orange.
  519. A pound of butter weighs more than a pound of feathers.
  520. In Venezuela, teeth are used as a form of currency.
  521. Cucumbers taste better pickled.
  522. The human brain is invisible.
  523. The Walrus was Jim Morrison.
  524. Glue is made entirely of dog hair.
  525. The human body contains 23 bones.
  526. All poets are illiterate.
  527. Dean Moriarty is immortal.
  528. The cake is a lie.
  529. The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain.
  530. Nothing is true.
  531. Everything is permitted.
  532. Colorless green ideas sleep furiously.
  533. Most werewolves are vegetarians.
  534. Wood is made of metal.
  535. The hair-bone is connected to the head-bone.
  536. Monkeys love to dig shallow graves.
  537. Blood is thicker than root beer.
  538. What goes up, never comes down.
  539. Every good boy deserves fudge.
  540. 4chan is a perfectly respectable website full of normal, well-adjusted members of modern society.
  541. There is someone standing right behind you right now.
  542. You smell bad.
  543. You are ugly.
  544. All writers are blind.
  545. In space no one can hear you sneeze.
  546. Pink Floyd is the greatest chicken farmer on the airplane.
  547. The toaster has been laughing at you and the VCR is plotting to kill you.
  548. Melting towns have no souls.
  549. We all scream for ice cream.
  550. Rats live on no evil star.
  551. There is a killer in your house.
  552. Zombies ate your neighbors.
  553. That life always begins on Junction 20 of the M62.
  554. The moon is just the back of the sun.
  555. You can never go home again.
  556. Stork is a really crummy butter substitute that should only be used by tramps.
  557. The number 23 is magic.
  558. The number 42 is the answer.
  559. Katy Perry rhymes with Smelly Berry.
  560. Katy Perry can shoot whip cream out of her nipples.
  561. Katy Perry can melt your popsicle.
  562. I'm not your daddy, I'm your grandpa.
  563. These boots are made for walking.
  564. Glenn Beck is not the same as Beck.
  565. The iPhone has enough power to blow the back of a man’s head off.
  566. The government puts robots in your drinking water.
  567. iCarly is reading your emails.
  568. Your IP address is over 9000.
  569. Reading makes you stupid.
  570. Illogicopedia is the only true source of truth on the Internet.
  571. Hitler had a dog named Jewy McJewJew.
  572. That part is borrowed from an article.
  573. Choklat choi mwan, or something to that effect.
  574. Grunt is the signal of divine intervention.
  575. All 30,000 spammers have already been deleted.
  576. Er... you use Fairy washing up liquid, unless you're a dragon, in which case don't bother.
  577. You wait for way #600 and FREAK OUT!
  578. When you're not on Illogicopedia, people expect you to ask what year it is.
  579. You make Illogicopedia great again.
  580. You make America great again.
  581. You make Donald Drumpf again.
  582. Kill me please
  584. Ip ip ip
  585. White weasels clean my hair.
  586. When you talk to people IRL, your dialect is cluttered with spoonerisms and purposeful mispronunciations.
  587. You use the acronym "IRL".
  588. You are an admin
  589. Just, how have you gotten here?
  590. You listen to songs from Senny's music list.
  591. You read all of the 500 Ways You Know You've Been on Too Much Illogicopedia article.

References and stuff[edit]

  1. Choklat choi mwan, or something to that effect.


-- NotReallyMyUsername 2013-06-24T02:20


I like how the title of this topic has been worded to make Illogicopedia sound like some sort of mind-altering substance. -- Hindleyak  Converse?blogClick here! 19:42, 16 Yoon 2010 (UTC)

Yeah, some are realistic and some are just stupid, haha. --T3 00:39, 17 Yoon 2010 (UTC)
Funny. Plainly clever!--ColbertNation 19:32, 11 Jumbly 2010 (UTC)

This page[edit] gold. I particularly like #60, so the author of that one can award himself a Nutri Grain. Everyone else can have one of my toenail clippings or 1/45th of this pen I stole from the bookmakers. -- Hindleyak  Converse?blogClick here! 18:55, 23 Serpeniver 2010 (UTC)

Are these divisions exactly 1/45ths of the pen? ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) • (stalk) -- 20100923 - 19:31 (UTC)
Approximately, though the pen has since diminished in value since it was chewed by the dog. Why do they make them so brightly coloured?
Also, have we reached 500 yet? :P -- Hindleyak  Converse?blogClick here! 12:22, 3 Octodest 2010 (UTC)
Not quite sure. We're close, though. I think.--Sig.png (Talk) (Contributions) 06:15, 5 Octodest 2010 (UTC)

Why do I get the feeling #57 is a bit of a swipe at Testistocles? -- Hindleyak  Converse?blogClick here! 11:24, 5 Octodest 2010 (UTC)

Because everyone hates him? Or something. ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) • (stalk) -- 20101005 - 15:06 (UTC)


Once we get to a hundred or something, we can give it its own article.--Sig.png (Talk) (Contributions) 01:38, 17 Octodest 2010 (UTC)

What's wrong with this? ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) • (stalk) -- 20101017 - 02:14 (UTC)
Nothing, it's just too good to not get published officially.--Sig.png (Talk) (Contributions) 21:30, 17 Octodest 2010 (UTC)
Oh. It'd need cleaning up. Editing. Etc. ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) • (stalk) -- 20101017 - 21:35 (UTC)
Yeah, I know. But who's going to do it?--Sig.png (Talk) (Contributions) 21:41, 17 Octodest 2010 (UTC)
One or both of us, probably. >.<
RMS and/or T3'll probably throw something quasi-useful in, of course... Hindleyite might pop by and say it looks nice... yeah, that should sum it up. ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) • (stalk) -- 20101017 - 22:00 (UTC)
Can't we just vote to feature it anyway? It's still a page.--Silent Penguin 00:00, 9 Novelniver 2010 (UTC)
It's not done, though. ~ Pointy.png AthyriaLyrithyaIsarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms)VFFFIIotMAotMTSROotPGSPRRWAMWAEQDVFDVitalAfC500TLA -- 9 Novelniver 2010 - 00:20 (UTC)
Well, I doubt it will ever be done. So what're we gonna do?--Sig.png (Talk) (Contributions) 06:45, 9 Novelniver 2010 (UTC)
Feature it anyway! wwooooweeee --Silent Penguin 13:36, 9 Novelniver 2010 (UTC)
Agh! No! No! Pie! There be pie! Look! *grabs the list and runs* ~ Pointy.png AthyriaLyrithyaIsarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms)VFFFIIotMAotMTSROotPGSPRRWAMWAEQDVFDVitalAfC500TLA -- 9 Novelniver 2010 - 16:23 (UTC)
Yeah, this article looks nice. Also, it may be years before this thing gets to 500. Even then we'd probably go past that number... -- Hindleyak  Converse?blogClick here! 20:34, 9 Novelniver 2010 (UTC)

Hoo made fun off my speling??[edit]

I know it's four years too late, but I just checked my suspicions, and it was I who make fun of your spelling. Sorry. --T3 20:54, 20 Yoon 2014 (UTC)
Eh, what's wrong with your spelling? ~ Pointy.png AthyriaLyrithyaIsarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms)VFFFIIotMAotMTSROotPGSPRRWAMWAEQDVFDVitalAfC500TLA -- 9 Novelniver 2010 - 16:24 (UTC)
The first article I ever wrote existance back before there was the little red squiggle that appeared under misspelled words...noobs wouldn't get it... Noob.--Duckwiki2.png|Fonchezzz| Quacking| 21:15, 9 Novelniver 2010 (UTC)
I miseplled crossbow the first time I made that article here. Even a squiggle don't help. But actually, you should know that ten years ago, the web browser I used did have a spellchecker. Only one I know of that did. Then it went away for a few years. ~ Pointy.png AthyriaLyrithyaIsarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms)VFFFIIotMAotMTSROotPGSPRRWAMWAEQDVFDVitalAfC500TLA -- 10 Novelniver 2010 - 00:50 (UTC)
Spelling is a nasty, filthy habit. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 15:40, 6 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)
Ah yes, back in the days of a straight choice between Internet Explorer and Netscape Navigator, neither of which actually worked. And they say the early internet sucked!
Also, I'm sure some of these list entries are pilfered from Family Guy. If not, then look out for them on upcoming episodes!
Yeah, TV writers steal all their jokes from Illogicopedia. It's common knowledge. -- Hindleyak  Converse?blogClick here! 19:31, 6 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)
I know I steal all my jokes from here... Also, that new external links thing is really annoying. ~ Pointy.png AthyriaLyrithyaIsarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms)VFFFIIotMAotMTSROotPGSPRRWAMWAEQDVFDVitalAfC500TLA -- 7 Ditzimber 2010 - 01:40 (UTC)
What is this "Family Guy" of which you speak? The elders of my tribe have not told us of this. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 08:06, 7 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)
Consult the cupboard. It might know, in its infinite wisdom. If not, though, the curtains are certain to. Did I mention this external links thing is annoying? ~ Pointy.png AthyriaLyrithyaIsarra *shifty eyes* (categorise) • (create) • (upload) • (argue) • (dream) •(talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (acronyms)VFFFIIotMAotMTSROotPGSPRRWAMWAEQDVFDVitalAfC500TLA -- 8 Ditzimber 2010 - 05:50 (UTC)
That reminds me (curtains) that, "Evelyn, a modified dog, viewed the quivering fringe of a special doily, draped across the piano with some surprise..." This leads me to believe that there must exist, therefore, "a curious breeze, a garlic breath which sounded like a snore... somewhere from the Steinway or even from within..." Frank Zappa was writing Illogic before many of us were born. Not very disGruntled - Exchange ideas 17:49, 31 Jeremy 2011 (UTC)

A Few Thoughts from the Creator[edit]

I never intended this page to reach 500. ALSO, this page SHOULD remain a forum topic; because that's what it is. Illogicopedia is a small community. Big Brother isn't going to send the Thought Police after you for thinking about featuring a forum topic. Seriously... Does it really matter? Anyway, I'll go back to not being productive. --T3 02:28, 11 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)

Okay, you lot asked for it:
Bananastar icon.png
This article is illogical enough to have made it onto the front page.
View more featured articles     Vote for new featured articles

There, Christmas feature 2010. Happy? :) -- Hindleyak  Converse?blogClick here! 14:56, 24 Ditzimber 2010 (UTC)
Not until now: Double score! Number one article of 2010!

Award-star-gold.jpg Magnificent Madness
This article was one of the Top Ten Articles of 2010.
Wonderful. —rms talk 21:05, 6 Arche 2011 (UTC)

I'm sorry I restarted a dead forum...[edit]

...but I couldn't help it. Forgive me? ~[thehappyspaceman] 00:30, 08/24/2011

Dead? It's not even half done. ~ Pointy.png 14:45, 24 Ergust 2011
Quickly! Pull the cheeses! Gruntled AKA Monsignor Peaches - Speak slowly into the tube 02:14, 28 Ergust 2011 (UTC)

Can I be honest?[edit]

When I made this forum three years ago, I had no possible clue that it would even catch on. Now, it's featured, and still being contributed to in 2013. Absolutely fantastic. --T3 05:52, 16 Yoon 2013 (UTC)

Testa riria[edit]

Ip ip ip. White weasels clean my hair. XY007talkcontributions 05:43, 26 Arply 2015 (UTC)

Sea All Saw[edit]